Daniel L. Overcoming morning pain

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Question

I wonder if there is any advice out there to help me. I am currently treating my TMS with information from this website and books, I feel I am doing well in some aspects. My biggest problem seems to be mornings. I can go to bed feeling amazing, sometimes completely cured. Then, I wake up in the morning and everything is back exactly as it was. I feel very anxious, tight, in pain and sometimes (like today) quite desperate.
I tell myself that its just my subconscious getting to me in the night and that as the day goes on I will improve again, but I know that if I don't get a grip on it I will have an awful day and that scares me.
I do quite a lot of activity in the morning before work, muck out horses, ride sometimes walk the dog. You would think this would 'shake me out of it' but it doesn't.
I would be so grateful for any advice you can give.

 

Answer

You’re in good company – I think this is a very common problem amongst the TMS community. Many of us have had experiences of waking up feeling like crap nearly every day.

I want you think about your Autonomic Nervous System (Google it if you’re not sure what it does). Nearly all of the functions of your ANS are unconscious, and therefore you don’t have conscious control of them. BUT, our ANS is a lot like any muscle in our body – it can be trained to work better and stronger.

When you wake up in the morning, check and see how your ANS feels – are you exhibiting signs of anxiety? Is your heart rate up? How’s your breathing? Are you sweating? Are you itchy? Etc. These are all functions controlled by your ANS. If you wake up and any of these things are present, then you know that your unconscious anxiety is taking over at night and freaking you out.

How to fix this? Be as aggressive as you can about regulating your ANS during the day. Send messages to your unconscious all day long that you don’t want to feel anxious, nervous, stressed, etc. You want to feel relaxed and safe. It may take a while, but eventually your ANS will get the picture and regulate itself at night the same way you regulate it during the day. Eventually, you’ll wake up with fewer and fewer symptoms. This process won’t happen overnight, but as I tell all of my clients, the two most important words to remember are Patience & Persistence. Patience & Persistence.

In the meantime, when you wake up – make sure that you’re actively regulating your nervous system ASAP. Don’t let yourself run from the anxiety – you want to pay attention to it and calm yourself in the moment.

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This is my latest thought process, to tell the unconscious ahead of time that I don't want it to misbehave. I view the unconscious as a bad child that just wants to misbehave and will try anything, but in the end all the work is worth it because the child isn't really bad, it just needs discipline.

 

I second what Daniel and Peggy said!
Rather than tell yourself you will feel better as the day goes on, talk to yourself about feeling good now.

 

You know what? I also like this quote. I was thinking of a list the things we need to do to reduce our TMS:

- talk to ourselves ahead of time and tell ourselves we aren't going to do that
- then while we are doing it, to pay attention to it and calm yourself in the moment
- and as a precursor to it all, journal, meditate and practice mindfulness

Anything else? Does that cover it?

We all think we are different, that our pain is different, but it seems like our processes are the same.

 

Our bodies need to wake up after sleeping all night. No wonder we feel stiff and ache.
It helps me to do some deep breathing and mild stretching. I too put my mind in a positive mode.
I still practice the mantra: "Every day in every way I'm getting better and better."
After the first 5 or 10 repeats, I feel so relaxed I feel sleepy.