Pain, Addiction and Self-harming

Pain becomes an addiction. A fix.

I’m not talking about dull aches. They’re just annoying, an irritation.

I’m talking about the heroin of pain. The hard stuff. The pain so bad you transcend and escape. The pain so bad you allow yourself the really strong painkillers saved for only these occasions.

And then bliss.

People become addicted to pain medication. But possibly they are addicted to pain first.

And how is this different from those who choose to self-harm? Self-harming is viewed with disgust whereas (unconsciously created) back pain is given sympathy. But perhaps the self-harmer deserves the more respect. At least they are honest.

I chose to take ownership of the pain in my back

It is not being done to me. I am as responsible for (unconsciously) inflicting it equally as if I were holding a knife and cutting my arm.

(You can’t write that, people will think you are nuts, not to mention a self-harmer)

I chose to take ownership of the pain in my back

What makes a person choose one addiction over another? Personality. Someone strung less tightly than me would find a different diversion.




Post Script: I wrote the above about 5 or 6 years ago when I was in chronic pain and was just starting on my Sarno/TMS journey. I wrote it as part of a series I have since put on a blog ( http://painfatigueandme.wordpress.com/about/), but decided it was too extreme to have on a blog where people unfamiliar with Dr Sarno and TMS would be viewing it and also because any friends I showed it to didn't understand it. I hope in this forum it has found an appropriate home for discussion.

 

Interesting. So I am thinking of stopping my low dose of pain killers that I have taken for years. I think it is just feeding the pain. What was your experience with this. How long until you noticed a difference?

 

Hi Joseph. I never took low dose pain killers as they didn't seem to actually do anything to lesson my pain. Very occasionally towards the end I would take tramadol on my doctor's advice to knock myself out from very acute pain. This was when I was literally bed bound and usually after the injections the specialist was giving me (directly into the ligaments - very painful and another story). But interestingly, this served a useful purpose as it removed the pain and therefore there was nothing for my mind to fixate on. Which at that time seemed strangely in line with what I was learning about how to treat TMS ie ignore the pain. This only happened a few times and it was only maybe 2-3 months (after I read The Mindbody Prescription) before I was pretty much pain free. That is, 2-3 months from when I was off-work and horizontal to when I was back at the office and living normally. After a total of about 2 years of ever worsening pain. I explain it a bit more here: http://painfatigueandme.wordpress.com/2013/12/10/dr-john-e-sarno/. All the best with your journey