Success Threads and emotions

I'm somewhat new to the forum having just officially joined yesterday (been lurking for probably a year or more).

My question is ...... I tend to read the success stories and whether or not they apply directly to me, I end up crying ..... alot. Is this part of the process? I think I'm a pretty sensitive person anyway, but I'm concerned that I'm giving my symptom(s) imperative power when I do this. Almost as if I'm weak. Advice please?

 

You're doing an excellent job if your crying. That's a form of release LindaRK.
How are you doing overall with your journey?

 

Well, technically, I'm just starting with the program .... today is Day 3 . Plus, I'm in the midst of a flu/respiratory bug. A little odd since I've not had the flu since grade school and I'm 56. Makes me wonder if once I decided to do this program my brain tried to deter me! Anyway, the best part is that I'm excited to do my "work" each day! Thanks so much for your support.

 

Hi, Linda. Herbie is right that crying is a form of TMS release.
Crying should be required of us all, even after we go beyond childhood.

You probably got the flu because it's going around a lot right now.
You can get it even if you had a flu shot.

Or it could be related to your TMS repressed emotions.
Your unconscious may have decided to give you the flu as a place to
add to any other symptoms you have.

You're excited about the Structured Education Program and are in Day 3.
That's great. Do the work but take time off to enjoy the day.
Watch the Olympics if you want. It'll take your mind off pain or flu.

Are you journaling and deep breathing and doing meditation?
Those are three of the best things to do to heal TMS pain.

And laugh. I find that when I worry about anything or feel any pain,
I can laugh it away fast.

Have a great weekend.

 

Hi Walt ..... Yes to meditating and journaling! Definitely going to watch the Olympics ...... the Pineapple Express is roaring through here this weekend and it's a perfect time to cheer on our athletes! Thanks for your support.

 

I just wish the Olympics would stop being so nationalistic and just have the world's best athletes
compete against each other without flags or national uniforms or coats or flags.

I think the obsession with winning the most gold medals, like the Russians want in ice hockey,
just adds to tensions between nations. Didn't seeing the Earth from Outer Space teach everyone
that we are just a pebble in the sand of the galactic beach? National pride should go just so far.

I watched most of but not all of the opening ceremonies and thought most of it was one long
propaganda commercial for a country that I respect in some ways but deplore in others.
Today, Russian friends in a suburb near to Chicago, say it's overrun with Russian Mafia.

But maybe I'm into politics and shouldn't be, that will be all of that.

 

LindRk, if you find yourself crying you could be mildly depressed. That's normal, but it shouldn't go on for years. There could also be something connecting with you in those success stories, a part of you that knows that you are already healed, but you may not want to accept it because being healed may open up that world that TMS is hiding. You see the others' successes and you want to have the strength to let go and get there too. But by doing so, you may have to face your weaknesses, which is what Jung said was a tremendous fear. The shadow as he described it is "that thing which we have no wish to be."

As I look back, it's clear to me that I began writing a book before I was healed because the truth was already within me. It often fights to be made known but gets buried by ego and fear. The people who accept TMS appear to be the ones who are ready to heal. The ones that reject it are the ones that still need the wall to hide behind. There are other factors in rejecting TMS, as well. I wrote an article on it; it gets complex.

Steve

 

Steve, thanks for your heartfelt reply. I believe what you're saying is spot on for me. Mild depression could be woven in there, but for me, the anxiety is paramount in all of this. I am currently seeing a psychotherapist with whom I've discussed pain and emotions. I'm also reading Tolle`s Practicing The Power Of Now. I'm someone who is very hard on herself in many ways. Anxiety and worry makes living in the moment quite difficult. Though I've had anxiety for over 35 years, my back pain announced itself in 2006 and from there morphed into other pain and anxiety. I've had alot of events in my life and challenges as well. When I read the success stories, I cry because I feel like perhaps I'm not deserving of freedom from the pain and anxiety .... if I was deserving of it, why doesn't it go away? Of course, I've read Sarno, your book, others ..... now instead of lurking on this site, I've taken the step to complete the SEP. I'm hoping that by following through on this program and doing my "homework", my brain and hopefully, my ego. For me, the fear is perhaps, what could my life be like without the pain and anxiety. As much as I don't want either one, something deep inside of me obviously does.

 

Welcome, Linda. This is a great place for warm and compassionate support.

You are not weak. Absolutely not weak. You wouldn't be here, otherwise. We can have weaknesses, but it doesn't make us weak. We can be victimized, but we don't have to become a victim. See the differences?

It takes strength to ask questions outside the box, which is what this place is about. You are asking, which means you are ready to start finding answers.

The Power of Now is another tool, and a very useful one. Pema Chodron has some lovely tools, as well. There are many tools from many sources. Choose what works for you, or what could potentially work for you. As you change, your tools may change, too.

Fear and anxiety and pain become part of our identity. Who and what are we without those aspects? Well, who do you want to be? That is the real question. Every single day we have the opportunity to reinvent ourselves. It is more difficult to get those around us to accept those changes. They may not realize you are changing, and they try, whether consciously or unconsciously, to keep you where you have been.

When you wake up in the morning, consider that question -- who do I want to be today? Then try it. It takes practice, so don't set yourself a time limit. Just keep working at it. Pick aspects that are doable. Build small successes. It all adds up.

You can do this. We all believe in you.

with grace and gratitude,
^_^

 

Lily, thank you for your response. So many smart people on forum! Looking forward to learning and I will definitely try your "morning routine"!

 

Linda, you're getting it. I can always tell by the words people use when they talk, and how they tend to heal. The self language is important. In the beginning was the word.

You said several key words, all intuitive. The ones that stood out for me were "deserving of it." Early on I wasn't able to understand why the top mindbody docs were using affirmations like, "I deserve to be happy...I deserve to be healed." I was trying to use affirmations like "I will heal...I am healed." They understood it at a deeper level than I did back then. I said on the last page of my book and still believe it holds true that guilt and shame are the prime drives.

If you have anxiety then you're not at peace, there's something you want to say but won't, or cannot. And as you know if you read Dr. Sarno's and my book, that anxiety is unexpressed anger, and anger of course is the social reaction to fear. So it is really fear that starts the chain reaction to hell.

I tell everyone that I counsel that it takes great courage to heal. By joining this group you have stated to yourself that you now want to heal. The next step is to convince yourself that you deserve to heal. I believe that you're already healed, but your fear of "what's next" has frightened you to the point that you still need your pain. As you also know, your brain does not like anxiety, and so it creates a pain to save you from having to experience anxiety.

When I first started writing I contacted Tolle. I read The Power of Now, and everything I could get my TMS-hands on. But ultimately I had to heal myself, no one else could do it for me.

You can stop all of your anxiety now, and end all your pain now, the power is now (see how I tied Tolle into my point?). But you need your pain right now, you fear letting it go. When you -re-balance your life you won't have any need for pain because you'll finally be where you want to be in your life. When you find your path it will be smoother walking/sailing, with the wind at your back. I see healing often enough to know where the pain is coming from, and what frees people.

Good luck,

Steve

 

That is just beautiful, Steve. Reminds me of this poem by Marianne Williamson from A Return to Love:

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness
That most frightens us.

We ask ourselves
Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God.

Your playing small
Does not serve the world.
There's nothing enlightened about shrinking
So that other people won't feel insecure around you.

We are all meant to shine,
As children do.
We were born to make manifest
The glory of God that is within us.

It's not just in some of us;
It's in everyone.

And as we let our own light shine,
We unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.
As we're liberated from our own fear,
Our presence automatically liberates others.

 

Ellen, the poem was very appropriate because at Mass this morning,
the priest's sermon was about how Jesus taught his Disciples to share and spread
his Light to the world, which they did and it's still spreading.

 

Ellen I quoted that Williamson, A Return to Love, in my book on page 38. I thought it was appropriate for people with TMS. The un-deserving attitude is widespread.

It's also true, as Marianne said:
"And as we let our own light shine,
We unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.
As we're liberated from our own fear,
Our presence automatically liberates others."

I knew that my own healing story would allow others to know that they can heal too. When we witness something we know that it can happen.

Steve

 

The first time I learned of this was as Nelson Mandela's speech. I did not realize he was quoting this poem. I absolutely love it, and it is deeply appropriate for everyone. We should all say it to ourselves, and those we love, on a daily basis. It is perfect.

with grace and gratitude,
^_^