What the heck

So I have been giving myself consistent messages of safety. Going out more and not avoiding activities. And my sensations have completely ramped up. Trying to stay calm but feeling a bit disappointed that they've heightened instead of lessening

 

Hello!
Here to make you feel better (I hope)
When I did the first big "activity" which I would have usually avoided, my symptoms did flare up a lot.
I visited a new city, and spent the whole day walking and drinking coffee at little caffe's. it was awesome.
But there where a lot of moments, especially at the end of the day where my symptoms definitely flared and I had the feeling I couldn't continue. I pushed through tho (took some painkillers) and after that I can honestly say my CFS symptoms have lessened so much when I go out. It's like my brain took note and said oh well. apparently we can do this now.
This was only after I didn't let my symptoms stop me though, and I really had a lot of them because I think my brain really freaked out because of all the things I started doing.

Since then I don't have much problem doing active things anymore, (i'm not fully recovered, but getting there

*insert 26 disclaimers:
This "pushing through" works for me, but might not work for everyone. (also when I tell my psychologist he really. is. not. happy.)
It's also kind of a gamble because only you can judge if your symptoms are TMS and if they are dangerous or safe.
But I just wanted to give you this bit of information so you can add it to your decision making

 

It’s called an extinction burst and it means you are on the right track. This will happen from time to time during your recovery and each time will last less and less.

I’ve had at least 5/6 extinction bursts during my 10 month recovery so far and I can honestly say after each time I noticed a considerable improvement.

Respond the same as before in that you know it’s TMS trying to fight back and that’s it, there’s nothing wrong with you.

 

I mean it's consistent sitting pain and I've never got rid of it. It's just ramping up over the last few weeks since messages of safety and getting bsck to life.

 

@BloodMoon made the best comment today in another thread "and then carry on with what I want to do the best I can, despite the symptoms."

This is exactly how symptoms are overcome.
We recognize the pain, notice our thought patterns and attitude about it, and then carry on with what we want to do in the best way we can, despite the symptoms.

 

Thanks everyone.
I've done the Sep snd hsve started with a coach.

 

You're doing great for not giving up!
What gets me through it the most is the notion that: This is hard.
Continuing despite symptoms is extremely hard, and you don't always hear that in the recovery stories.
When you're suffering and trying to get trough the day it can really feel like this isn't the way to go, and you're doing it wrong, but it might as well be the fastest way to recovery. (saying this as much to myself as to you btw)

 

Thank you.
Success stories are a double edged sword. Give you hope its possible but when people do it so quick it makes you wonder why it hasn't worked fir you YET

 

My impression of reading many people's success stories over the years is that only a minority of them lost their symptoms quickly.

As I've written to you before in other threads, you are not a special TMS case; what you are experiencing is not exceptional, it is 'par for the course' with TMS.

With impatience and despondency (although I note that you used the word "YET" which shows that you are somewhat less despondent than you were) it makes it difficult to lose symptoms. Why? Because it's playing right into one's TMSing brain's 'hands' - it keeps you fearful, fearful of not ever losing the symptoms and holding on to an underlying anger/rage (even if you don't think you are angry, believe me you are!) that you are not one of the few 'lucky ones' who just read a Sarno book and/or do a little bit of TMS/mind/body work and voila, symptoms gone!

We have a choice with TMS - be despondent and impatient (which is liable to failure or at the very least, slower progress) or optimistic and patient (which is liable to success, as quickly as it is possible for each of us as individuals to lose our symptoms). My advice: choose the latter!

I refer you to @TG957's book once again -- for her inspirational story of perseverance and patience which led to her gradual recovery from horrendous symptoms.

Are you including self-soothing calming techniques in your regimen, regularly as you go about your day? If not, you would do yourself a favour if you were to do so; Dr Sarno in his book "The Divided Mind" suggested to do self-soothing. See this in one of your threads where I give details of how to do this https://www.tmswiki.org/forum/threads/head-pressure.28956/#post-152348 (Head pressure)

 

Jim Prussack sometimes says the book healers (meaning people who read a book and got healed) usually got the symptoms back after a while and have to do the same work as everyone else. I think this goes along with what Loreley Mosely started talking about recently that they're more and more getting data pointing out some problems in the way TMS treatment is being comunicated from therapist to patient. One of the few things I don't like much in Unlearn Your Pain and The Way Out is that they bring too many cases of quick healings, making it look expected, and we all know TMS treatment is harder than that.

It's ok, there's a lot of frustration in this journey. Next when you meditate, talk to the part of your mind that's pissed off. Let it talk freely, it wants to be heard. And then you say you understand it, you explain that your primitive brain is figthing back your healing process because it's afraid of it, remind yourself you're not alone in this journey, and that healing will eventually come. Because it will.

 

“Thank you.
Success stories are a double edged sword. Give you hope its possible but when people do it so quick it makes you wonder why it hasn't worked fir you YET”

Here’s where you begin to see yourself in what you wrote:
The self-pressure
The standards you create by attempting to measure yourself against others
Timeline pressures you create for yourself: people may have attained success after several months/years of work
How You define success: is it learning and implementing the skills, opening the mind and learning how to become more at ease with yourself or is it only to stop pain?
Constantly falling into negative thought patterns: setting yourself up for success vs. always looking for how you are failing
Personality traits: perfectionism, defeatist etc

These are the kinds of TMS skills we learn: how to recognize the pitfalls, how to do the work with internal meaning vs looking at it like lessons we just do to get the A on the report..

This is why it’s hard and takes time. Our brains are stubborn and think the stuff we learned in the past is right, and resists us when we try to retrain it.

 

Yes I have already said to some people that I don't like to keep crying about it because I don't want to fall in the victim trap. Which is very very hard.
No I don't just want rid of my pain. I want a better relationship with myself in general.
The nail in the coffin when the pain all started was after trauma. I pressured myself then snd yes I'm fully aware I'm pressuring myself now. I'm trying to work on that. It's more I like to be in control. And nothing makes you feel more out of control than a brain that you sre struggling to talk too lol.
I know how I may come across here. But I am willing to talk emotional.

 

How do u do this

 

@Sarah89 How do you talk to your brain? Is that what you're asking? You can't have read Sarno if you don't know what feduccini is talking about with the advice they have given you!

Dr. Sarno taught that the brain creates physical symptoms as a way to distract us from unconscious negative emotions. One of the key steps in Dr. Sarno’s method is to repudiate the pain. By literally talking back to your brain and saying something like, “You are not my pain. I’m just avoiding a repressed emotion”, you send a message to your brain to interrupt its process in order to protect you.

Watch this video about it by Dan Buglio...

 

No I don't mean that. I thought when you meditate you don't talk back to your brain you just watch the thoughts go by without reacting to them.
I talk to my brain the rest of the time but not during meditation

 

In mindfullness, yes, you just observe. But there are a number of meditative states that allow you to be more active than that. IFS work for example clearly makes a point on having a conversation with your stressed parts during meditation. Howard Shubbiner's meditation audios also have moments when you talk back to your uncounscious, as do some of Curable ones. Btw Schubbiner himself says mindfullness alone is not enough, you need to somehow address the emotions.

A lot of TMS treatment comes from psychoanalysis. I recommend watching some video explaining Jung's concept of Shadow. It's likely it will ressonate with a number of thoughts and emotions you might be going through. But to summarize, during your meditations you might be catching a lot of stray bad thoughts. These are repressed parts of your uncounscious and they play a big role in symptoms development. The key is letting them speak, and then you sooth them like you would with a person you love.

 

This is very confusing isn't it. Knowing what needs to be done

 

It is hard work for sure. Everyone has their path and it's made of experimenting. I'd recommend using the guided meditations and somatic trackings for a while, otherwise you might feel overwhelmed with the information.

This one is for emotional tracking: