Working out through pain. Injury or tms?

So today has been my big first hurdle and i would like some help please!

So i have been back working out for 3 months now and have built up a lot of muscle back and i am loving it however last night i stretched my shoulder and felt a bit of a sharp pain. I did the wrong thing by lifting my arm up and down to see if my shoulder was ok and there was a bit of a sharp pain when lifting my arm.

Today i still had the pain and i tried to convince myself it was tms by going to the gym and working out arms but the pain was slighlty increasing after each set so i called it quits and left just incase it was real.

I have a lot of pressure on the gym as i love going and i have a LOT of confidence issues on the way i look at the moment. I feel so unattractive and often deem myself disgusting. I have left the gym recently extremely sad and depressed as there are girls in there that i find attractive and i think i have gained some form of strange infatuation with one of them which is very emmbrassing but also not that surprising as i have had 8 years of pain and isolation. So i know there is a lot of emotional baggage i have built up from going to the gym.

I didt know whether to carry on with the workout as i was pretty sure it was tms? I decided that if it was a injury or muscle strain from potentially aggravating my shoulder it would heal in a week or so? So for now im taking a week off at least on any upper body work and will just train legs and work on calming myself for the time being.

Any advice or tips would be appreciated! Should i have kept working out with the pain? I never have any significant pain when working out, if i do its only for a couple minutes then it dissipates so this time was different, it was not going away. Do people tend to work through pain with tms during their workouts?

I didt really hurt when doing a exercise but rather a dull ache after during rest periods

 

I'd keep working out. I have had all sorts of mystery weaknesses and pain working out over the last quarter century and it was ALWAYS TMS.
I am only recommending this to you because you are educated. This whole new 'graded exposure' thing sounds like so much OCD.
The quickest way to send a message to the unconscious that you aren't 'playing' is to go and do something really strenuous. If I have a shoulder pain? I drop and do push-ups. Knee pain? I go running. Hand pain? I squeeze something a hard as I can WHILE doing a personal inventory in my brain about what might have caused me to need a new distraction

 

I maybe need more experience with this technique, sounds quite intense for me!

 

It's what Sarno recommended. I have noticed since phrases like 'graded exposure' have show up (not Sarno) so has the length of people's recovery time. If you really believe you have TMS, babying it is only prolonging the symptoms and conditioning.

 

This is the key of it really. The belief and confidence that it is TMS opens up the possibility of saying "bring it on" and do whatever you want without being intimidated by whatever symptoms arise. I often had pain while working out, running, lifting, walking whatever the trigger is... I tended to keep on exercising -> no better message to the unconscious that the activity is not dangerous to you.

However, there is room for kindness and compassion here too depending on how you are feeling - pushing through pain while feeling a lot of fear in my experience has prolonged symptoms. So if you are feeling a lot of fear might be time to step back, take a look at your life - are there any big stressors right now beyond the pain - what are you needing distraction for, give yourself some self-soothing (hello loving-kindness meditations, hand-on-heart practices, mindful walks etc), and get back to exercising once you are feeling more grounded (not necessarily feeling less pain - you can be grounded and fearless with pain).

A wonderful story that helps me is that the Buddha towards the end of his life started experiencing powerful stomach pain but he carried on teaching, walking, being generous and clear-minded. The physical pain didn't lead to the psychological pain. As TMS is purely psychological pain we can take it a step further - when we can carry on living our lives in the face of pain without being clouded by fear, self-judgement, and wanting the pain to go away it loses power over us and will disappear over time.