You're ok

I'm usually responding to threads but I wanted to say something that needs to be said. You're ok if you have TMS. You're ok physically and you're ok mentally.

Since everyone has been checked out medically before trying TMS healing, we know that you are fine physically, and that you will heal.

This also applies mentally. Many people feel that they have some mental problem, or that they are somehow different because they have TMS. This is not true. The TMS exists because you are a good person, and that you care too much. These people are good people, they care very very much. Dr. Sarno had come to that conclusion long ago and that's what I'm seeing also. You are very nice, good people.

This demand to have to be nice or "on" all the time is deeply enraging to the inner self. I see people all the time wondering what is wrong with them? Am I really messed up Steve? No, you are fine. If you didn't care so much your mindbody wouldn't over-respond as it does. So rest easy, take it easy on yourself, ease off of you.

If you have some hard hitting TMS right now, then you have been overwhelmed by life, that's all. It is a normal reaction to demands and fear. But I would never call TMSers normal, they are exceptional. I'm very honored to have met all of them. Their stories have moved me deeply and have made me aware that we are all the same people, sharing the same life together. I once thought that I was the only one who felt certain ways. But I now see clearly that everyone sees life as I do (besides my whacky humor--much of that only I see, lol).

And also remember, it is those people who don't believe in the TMS process who don't heal. They argue against it, and take every chance to pick it apart. They won't heal because all healing is based on belief. But all that means is that they still need their pain, what's underneath is too painful to face, so they search for reasons not to heal. This too is common. Healing is a personal choice. Anyone can heal.You're ok.

Happiness first, and good health will certainly follow...

Happy Easter

Steve

 

First, I'd like to say thank you Steve for this reminder.

My sense of humor is kicking in tonight so I'll tell you that instead of going to bed tonight calling myself a 'nutcase' - I'll fall asleep reminding myself that I'm a wonderful, caring, loving nutcase!! Lol Great message....thanks!!

Karen

 

This is so true Steve- I love your post- you the Rock Star

keep em coming- happy Easter to everyone and bless you all

 

Lots of wisdom and insight in this post. Thank you so much....

 

This is important to know in healing because it's tough enough to get people convinced they have TMS and that they are reacting to emotions they can't feel, are unaware that they have, or don't realize the magnitude of. If they feel as if they have some type of mental problem on top of all that they are tougher to get to and heal.

I was asked in a recent interview for some new site on TMS healing (about to be launched) if TMS should be considered a mental disorder? I spent a lot of time on that question because it was very important to set the record straight. I told them that Dr. Sarno would be horrified at the thought of that. TMS is not a mental disorder. It is a human reaction to fear, anxiety, anger, separation anxiety, etc...all of which stem from the fear of being alone; isolation. I've been calling it separation anxiety, Gabor Mate, MD calls it attachment disorder. Same things. Some physicians call it cash flow.

I suppose we could play the contrarians and say that all people are insane. I could not find one good argument against that notion. But we do know from Karl Menninger that psychotic people have few if any physical symptoms. And that when they come out of psychotic states that their physical symptoms return. So you could easily say that TMS is a disorder of the overly-sane, the people who care too deeply.

Then you have what's called neurosis. Dr. Sarno stated in Healing Back Pain, "they(TMSers) are not neurotic, or we are all neurotic." Well, I believe we are all neurotic to some degree, we simply don't want to suffer or die. Neurosis is simply having some issues under mental strain. Carl Jung said that neurosis is a stabilization method for the person to re-stabilize his life when going through turmoil. It all falls within what would be considered normal parameters. Psychosis is different. Psychosis is outside of what we would call normal behavior. But what is normal?

JOTD: Two Irishmen walk out of a bar. Hey, it could happen!!

Steve

 

that is good to hear thank-you . And thank you so much for writing your book, i was amazed by it and felt your struggle intently. I am just starting this path of taking a psychological approach but feel more hopeful of this approach than any medical one so far. I know i will one day recover from fibromyalgia its just a matter of when

 

cherrybomb, I commend you for your realization that fibromyalgia is a severe form of TMS. I belong to a
fibromyalgia support group and they are extremely resistant to learning about TMS. This is a shame because there is so much needless suffering. Most of the members are running constantly to all kinds of doctors, taking all kinds of dangerous medicine and they are only getting worse. I recovered from a diagnosis of fibro and you can also. I absolutely refused to accept the diagnosis. My husband is a doctor who, before he retired, was a full professor of medicine at a major university. He also thought I had TMS and he was right. He doesn't think very highly of the medical profession in general and has always reminded me to stay away from doctors, except when they are really needed. Give the body a chance to heal itself first. Most of the medical profession would have you believe that the body has no ability to heal itself which is utterly false.

 

But isn't that insane passivity part of the whole consumer society in which we fish are swimming? That mechanistic reliance on 'scientism' is what makes us believe that taking something some authority figure prescribes is going to somehow fix what's "wrong" with us, instead of helping us to fix ourselves.

 

That's exactly right Bruce. We have been really taken in by all of this.

 

I think specifically of Kaiser-Permanente where they're constantly running tests and screening for this or that. Whenever I go to Kaiser, I get so paranoid in their clinical environment, my blood pressure tests are high. However, if I go to my old family doctor that I've been seeing for 40 years, my blood pressure is uniformly low. Kaiser, it seems to me, is just a big insurance company that's being run by a forensics team of lawyer-physicians with a cookie cutter approach to prescribing meds, meds, and more meds. If you're over 50, they're going to put you on regime of 5 different meds no matter how you feel or act, no matter what physical shape you're in. How come my grandfather lived to 104 and never took anything at all? He worked outside in Montana as a pipe fitter until he was 79 doing hard, brutal physical work and after that he took long walks at altitude every day. I've heard that for 90% of illnesses and 'conditions' that people see a GP for, clean fresh air, exercise, a good diet and no stress would eliminate them. I just can't see how popping 5 meds a day is going to help you live one week longer than a normal human lifespan. But of course I'm a skeptic. I remember when I tore a rotator cuff and Kaiser told me I had to get an operation that was going to leave me in therapy for 9 to 13 months, I'm so glad I told them to shove it. Because 3 years later, my shoulder is absolutely fine and getting stronger and stronger. If I'd let them cut the muscles, they would have never been as strong again. I know a girl who works as a mountain guide on the East Side of the Sierra. Her knee kept going out and she had three operations in a row without any improvement. Got herself a new boyfriend, had a great vacation in Hawaii, now you never hear about her knee problems.

 

This is a GREAT attitude to have when starting out. You are on your way, cherrybomb!

 

Where's the nice lady who was a hairdresser? Is she around.

 

Steve, her name was Karen. Haven't seen her posting on the Forum in a while. Do a search?

 

Looks like she got quiet Bruce. Hope she's ok. Maybe should send her an email if possible. She sounded down but enthusiastic and ready.

 

I'm here! Doing quite well Steve. I was finishing your book!!
I did an up-dated post tonight here......http://www.tmswiki.org/forum/threads/a-hardened-heart.1859/

Thanks for being concerned!
I hope you're doing well also!!