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Dearest Bodhigirl,

Relapses are very difficult. I know them well, as even after all these years, I still get them occasionally. Usually it takes me a few days to get wise to the fact that the new/old symptoms are TMS. As soon as I realize and accept that it is TMS, then recovery can start. I can actually feel the shift take place. It's very easy for our brains to fall back into old familiar patterns. I see these neural pathways like grooves in my brain that my thoughts can easily fall into, and then some effort is needed for me to get out of its rut.

Emotions are not in need of "fixing", but feeling and accepting them. Research says they only last about 90 seconds unless our thoughts re-trigger them. So our thinking is in need of change after we feel and allow our emotions.

In my experience what keeps me in that old thinking pattern is primarily the story I tell myself about what is going on. A running narrative appears in mind in which I am a trapped victim of my body, my past, and the external forces outside myself. This feeds the cycle of pain and depression, and allows no joy into our mind.

I use the following strategies to stop the sad story in my head.

• First, realize it is a story and its power comes from believing it. It is not Truth. I don't advocate replacing it with some positive story, because we seldom can believe those.
• Depending on circumstances, I may switch my thinking to something neutral and benign. Right now I do this by thinking about the landscaping project I have underway in my yard, and what I need to do to accomplish it.
• Or I try to cultivate a place of "no thought" through diving into my senses--in nature, music, movement,art, touch etc.
• Or ( and I think this is the most powerful), I take my attention entirely off myself and think about how I can help someone else. That may be something I do in real life, or as simple as posting a supportive message on this Forum.

Wishing you peace........