The Presence Process - Share Experiences & Ask Questions

UPDATE: WEEK 6

Okay, so, funny turn of events. Due to a medical issue that popped up (I believe I'm being setup, as TPP would say), a doctor tells me to sit in a warm bath for 20 minutes a day for the next 2-3 weeks. This morning was the first day to start, so I did it like a water session. But I added the breathing with it the way you do in an intensive Presence Process, except I didn't make it real hot--just the normal body-temperature hot. I forgot my timer, but I think I was in there for about 35 minutes. For the first 20-25 minutes, my chest (and maybe heart) was resonating (which has been happening with this "burden" issue I'm processing from early childhood). At about 15-20 minutes, I switched from "I-am-here-now-in-this" to the Week-6 conscious response "I-integrate-charged-emotion," and I switched to doing it one-on-one-session style. That means I thought of a certain triggering event and a felt resonance surfaced. I thought of feeling like a burden. I asked how it makes me feel. Not long after that, maybe 1-3 minutes, a feeling washes over me. Probably fear, because it causes my breathing to be effected. I can't remember if that resolved before this next thing happened. Next, this really strong felt resonance comes over my chest and stomach muscles in a straight line. If you were to paint straight lines up the sides of my abs vertically and continue them up over my chest, too, the unpainted area area between the lines would be the area that started resonating strongly. The feeling was more intense than a lot of the felt resonances I've felt. I really enjoyed it, not because it felt good, but because I felt it, period. It happened over the areas where I carry shame and anger and grief--all things I've been processing lately.

That was pretty cool. I'm always excited when I feel good, strong felt resonances. Well...I say that, but anger's not always pleasant. Sometimes, it's kind of nice, though. And if it integrates, it's awesome. Feels great. I think I integrated a bit of the shame and anger over this "burden" issue yesterday, because I felt happy and laughed just a tad, along with emotional relief while I was processing it.

 

Brian, I find some of the set-ups to be amazing-- the universe is truly creative. It sounds like you're making great progress with the felt resonances. I'm getting quite sick of the "rest period" and feeling ready to start again! I know what you mean about it feeling good to feel whether the actual feeling is good or not. This was a new concept for me and it's been really liberating. Oh, I have had one interesting thing during the rest period during mediation; the experience of my heart expanding more, completely unrelated to any thought or event. And a weird thought accompanied it, that my heart was coming more "online."

Yb44-- I'm with the rest of you, Michael Brown's style seems difficult. It's not the material exactly, because I was already familiar with all of the concepts. However it is definitely sinking in but that could be because unlike my usual lazy style I'm been really trying to actively use it as much as possible. Maybe the guy needs a bit of humor.

 

Tarala,

That's very cool. Could you expound on what you mean by your heart "expanding? I'm pretty sure I know what you mean, but there are many nuances of that, so I was curious what gave you that feeling or what kind of feeling it was.

It's not Michael Brown's lack of humor. It's his writing style. It's from the 60s-70s. It's old school, so it's not written in a way the modern brain thinks. I've never liked that old style. That's why I'm tempted to rewrite it in modern style so it's easy to understand. I love to write.

 

I just got a copy of Michael Brown's THE PRESENCE PROCESS.
Now I just need some time to read it!

 

Awesome, Walt!

Well, thanks to Tarala, we know now that you can start the process immediately when you get the book if you want, and kind of catch up on the reading when time permits. But since you and I both write, I'm guessing you're similar me in that you like to take your time reading and process what you read and understand the mechanics first. Good luck getting through it and starting the process. It takes a little while to read. I had to carve out several hours over a couple of days to get through big chunks of the book, and the rest I read in the mornings for about 30 minutes to an hour. Took me a week or so, I think.

 

Oh, I almost forgot. That last update I gave, I forgot to mention that I had a major sensation in my ears during that felt resonance that came up in my lungs and affected my breathing. There's always this very, very quiet static in my ears. VERY quiet. I only notice it if it's quiet in a room and I focus on it. I think it has something to do with why background noise makes it hard for me to hear sometimes. That's my only real hearing issue (which can be annoying at times). So, whatever emotional signature came up, it was some fear from the past that directly affected my ears and hearing. I'm certain of that. That's cool that it's resolving itself now. My family on my father's side all have hearing issues (or at least the men do for sure...and maybe the women, but I forget). We're a stubborn bunch who won't always listen to others. lol I've made a lot of progress, though, thankfully.

 

Hey Brian, don't know if I can describe the heart feeling. About like describing what a mangosteen tastes like. There were no concepts or thoughts, and it wasn't really so much a physiological feeling. Just this sense of wideness in my heart, but that's actually a very poor description. I felt sort of bigger Not much help I know.

When I did TPP the first time, I read it the introductory bits, then as soon as I got to Week 1 I started doing the meditations and the conscious response. After a few days when the chapter was finished, I just started rereading it, which was useful, until the week ended and I went on to the next one. I think reading it right through before starting might have been just as useful for me, but my problem is I'm a reader and a thinker and often don't get around to actually putting things into practice. I love the theory (Egghead emoticon inserted here), but am rather lazy about doing it all. So this was why I started right away and committed to never missing a day or a meditation (Pat me on the back emoticon here). It's made a big difference I'm happy to say, and I can't wait to start the second one on Saturday.
Cheers, Terry

 

Tarala,

Thanks for the clarification. I misunderstood the first time you posted that info up about you starting the Presence Process as soon as you got the book.

In the past, I've been a reader and thinker without implementing things, as well. But I had good reason for not implementing them. I try to only do things I'm fairly certain are completely effective. If there are any doubts in my mind that a method isn't the best way to do something, I'm not going to waste my time on it. I'll keep searching without implementation. Sometimes, I'll try things for a while until I discover that they're ineffective. With the Presence Process, I knew from the start that it was effective and would do what it said it does, because I'd learned enough to know what was required for healing. I just didn't have a process, and this gave me that process I needed.

You might be like me in the implementation department. I look at that as an asset, not as lazy or lacking integrity. That's just my two cents, though.

Regarding your heart feeling bigger, yes, that helps me understand what you meant a bit more. I'd describe what my heart's doing as coming out of hiding or "hardness." I'd desensitized my ability to feel so much since, even when I was a baby, that I couldn't sense it anymore. My heart felt like a pariah, I believe--burdensome. So, it's just now starting to realize that there's nothing wrong with it, so it's stepping out little by little. Or another way I could describe it is, my heart's been there the whole time, scared, sad, and angry as hell, but I'm just now beginning to allow myself to feel its cries for help from that pit of neglect.

 

So, I'm doing my 1-on-1 today (that's something on ThePresencePortal.com), which means I thought of a situation that upsets me and let the felt resonance come up for it, then sat with it for up to 15 minutes. I'm still doing that right now, actually.

This one is interesting. I was listening to a person discussing a religious topic. And in my view of things, they were missing a big point and making a big deal out of something that's just theoretical. So, when these thoughts came to mind, emotional resonances surfaced, and I decided to use that as my 1-on-1 for the day. Multiple felt resonances came up at once:

1. Resonance within my eyes and nasal cavity (like a triangle). I've identified this one with that burden issue I have.
2. Resonance at my temples (this one's usually anger/frustration of some sort).
3. My chest manifested resonances across it.

These resonances added themselves to the mix one at a time. I put my focus/attention on them unconditionally and let them pass. The chest one's mostly gone. The other two still remain just a tad.

It's my opinion that I'm having these stronger felt resonances occur because I've been doing my morning breathing sessions in warm or hot water. And the first one I did was a lot longer than it should've been (35 minutes) which had a strong effect on my felt resonances, like a barrier had been broken down to some degree. Interesting!

 

UPDATE: WEEK 6

I mentioned earlier that I'm breathing while I'm in my 20-minute warm bath each morning (which is not what the Presence Process tells you to do--in fact, it says that's more along the lines of an intensive way to do it, and it shouldn't be done unless someone is with you. I'm doing it because I have a temporary issue that requires a 20 minute bath soak each morning right now). This is causing me to have felt resonances quite a bit during the day, and they stick around for a while, too. So, if someone hasn't been through the Presence Process at least once, or if they're not good at being with the felt resonances without reacting when they surface, this would not be easy for them at all.

I've had felt resonances surface in my head (frustration) several times during the day today while I was writing. I'm able to sit with them for a while, but if someone doesn't know what they're doing, they could easily react instead of responding by containing the emotion. I've caught myself reacting a few times today instead of responding. I can see how this could cause too much emotion to surface for people. I don't recommend this.

Luckily, I'm doing well with it. The more anger and frustration I can feel surfacing during the day, the better. I buried a lot of it when I was a kid, so there's a lot that needs to come up. My situation is great for this, actually, but I don't recommend it to others--especially the inexperienced. It'd be more of a hindrance than a help, I'm guessing. Maybe after someone's done one or two Presence Processes, they'd be okay doing something like this, but make sure you have someone with you during the bath sessions just in case a major surfacing memory comes up causing you a harsh reaction that could end up harming you in the bath.

 

UPDATE: WEEK 7

I started week 7 this morning. It's the week in which the bath sessions start (one time at the beginning of each week). As you know, I've been doing 20 minute breathing sessions in the warm bath for two weeks now due to having to be in the bath every morning anyway.

This morning, I had a strong felt resonance in my heart. I could just about feel it beating. It was like my heart had been activated, but really, I was just aware now of how it felt. It didn't pass quickly. It lasted hours. I can barely sense it now, but it's still there. I like this felt resonance. I think it's some kind of grief/sadness.

Yesterday, the felt resonance of anger/frustration was in my head strong for a lot of the afternoon and evening. I was reacting more than responding, I'd say. A money issue triggered it, which is good. It's an issue I want to deal with. Before, felt resonances would come for just a little bit, and then pass. Now, they come for long periods of time. Anger's the hardest to deal with. The others aren't bad, actually. I enjoy them. Interesting how the repeated water sessions bring on these felt resonances so much stronger. Unfortunately, I can't tell if it would have been different if I hadn't done these water sessions. However I do it is exactly as it's supposed to happen, though, so I can't do it incorrectly. I guess Presence wanted to fast track me, because these water sessions, along with ETT, are definitely accelerating it.

 

Brian I can only hope my second time around is as productive as yours! I think the rest period was a little too long for me, and I'm having trouble mustering up energy. But the first time around was amazing so I'm hoping to get my full enthusiasm back. Just started today. I think I'll give the intense bath thing a miss this time around though

 

Tarala,

I think I experienced the same thing when I started the process again. Like a loss of momentum, and therefore energy. It went away quickly.

 

Yesterday, I wrote that I could feel my heart very intensely for quite a while in the morning and that it was fading. Actually, I ended up feeling it all day. It was cool. And the halfway through the say, I had a big integration. I was laughing and crying for a while (happy tears). It was awesome. This Week 7 I'm on now is the same week I had a major integration like this during my first Presence Process, except it was anger I felt in my head at the time. My circumstances yesterday were awful, but I had a great day!

 

Hello TPP TMSers,

I watched the videos that are available and read (or listened to) TPP and began the process yesterday. I am new to TMS, though, as well and want to get some feedback on whether anyone else has started both at once. I feel the need to do something structured to get myself more emotionally in-tune, so that is why I have decided to start TPP as well. I feel very stuck and have a lot going on in my life right now. I am starting to feel my resistance to TMS coming up, though, in the form of strong doubts about whether many of my issues are structural. Also, A few TMS therapists have told me that one of my core issues is not something they have worked with before, although my TMS doc said he thought it was TMS. And I know that TPP can bring about resistance as well. So my question is whether this is too much? The TPP felt good yesterday, but it's too early to tell, of course. Thanks,

Andrew

 

Hi Andrew, sorry for the late reply but I'm on my phone at the moment and I'm not much of a thumb typer. It does sound like a lot to start both at once, but if you are like me it's a measure of desperation! If you have time I'm sure the TMS work and TPP are very complimentary. What is really working for me with TPP is that it is irrelevant whether the issue is "structual" or not. Pain is blocked energy, period. This has truly helped me to think psychologically rather than focusing on the physical. Or more precisely, to feel emotionally rather than focusing on the physical. It's pretty deep stuff but very worth the effort. I'm guessing it's also a big help for depression too.

 

I can tell you what TPP says about this, and I'll share my own experience.

TPP recommends that a person not add anything else to their TPP work, like a new workout regimen or eating healthier or anything else that's trying to "fix" a person. It basically says that doing those things are like fiddling with the effects rather than the cause, so they're pointless. TPP is dealing with the cause of all of the problems--the emotional body. All of that extra activity usually serve to overwhelm a person and sabotage their continuing the TPP process. TPP recommends doing the bare minimum of what it's asking you to do so you don't get overwhelmed and stop TPP.

TPP also says that this is a process of "not doing" rather than "doing." That's another reason it recommends not taking on additional things to "do." It says to put them on hold and do a 10-week PP (Presence Process) and then see if you feel you should do the additional stuff.

For me, I did only TPP. I was working out when I started TPP. I stopped working out probably halfway through my first 10-week PP. I stopped working out because I could tell I my working out was a reaction to some emotional issue, and I didn't want to feed that emotional issue anymore. I learned to relax and take it easy rather than piling on more things to do.

About three weeks after I finished my first PP, I started doing ETT in addition to my TPP. ETT is Emotional Transformation Therapy. The only reason I chose to do it is because it was offered to me for free, and it is specifically designed to make emotions and felt resonances surface. I saw EMDR therapy advocated on the TPP website, which is also for making emotions surface, so I figured ETT would be a good move, because I could do it once a week to bring even more emotions to the surface. The free ETT sessions was totally something that God worked out for me. ETT hasn't been around very long, so the odds of me getting it, and for free, are extremely unlikely. I went with it and it's helped me bring more emotions to the surface. It's also allowed me to have a therapist who I can have a dialogue with about what I'm going through. She sometimes picks up on things about me that I forgot. This helps, especially when I realize it on the heart level.

During my second PP, I also started doing the One-on-One session on the TPP website. One-on-One is misleading. It's something I do alone. I don't use the audio from the website. I listened to it once and understood how to do it without listening to the audio. It's just adding another 15 minute period each day where you work with some troubling emotions that surface. And you only do it for forty days. Then you're pretty good at doing it daily, when needed, and you're trained at allowing the emotions to come up or bringing them up yourself, if necessary.

So, keep in mind that even though I added some things to my TPP, they were things that were very easy to do with my schedule and very gentle. I believe it's really important to be gentle and do almost a bare minimum when possible, especially at the beginning. Adding little bitty things that directly address the emotional body (the causal point) are the only things I add to my TPP work. Michael Brown says that if a person wants to add one other thing, they can add a gentle Swedish massage once or twice a week with a good masseuse who's more concerned with technique than money. This helps get toxins out of the body, because TPP releases toxins pent up in the body. Any help washing out those toxins is beneficial.

This needs to be an easy process, because when some serious emotions start coming up, they can easily crash all the extra stuff we've added on.

Hope this helps!

 

If you start feeling awful at times, the TPP is working properly. Doesn't mean you need to feel awful all of the time, but that's a good sign. So, if you're having some health issue get worse, like structural problems, that's a good sign.

Just like Tarala said, the structural issue is an effect, not the cause. The cause of the structural problem is emotional. If you correct the emotional problem, the structural problem will correct itself. Keeping causes and effects straight in our minds is paramount in this process. If I have a structural issue that's not a major hindrance, I'll allow it to be there a while and see what emotional issues it brings up. If it becomes a major hindrance in my life, I'll go ahead and have it corrected. With health stuff, I try to embrace the physical pain and ask what emotional causes are behind it. I accept it as a messenger that's here to help me instead of trying to get rid of it and think of it as bad. It really is here to help me. Hindrances, though, I have to have corrected, if possible, so I can continue on with life and the process. Hope that makes sense.

 

Wow, I should have proofed my previous posts. Lots of mistakes. Sorry for the typos. Let me correct/clarify a statement I made earlier.

I didn't mean to say One-on-One is misleading. I meant to say the name "One-on-One" is misleading, because you do it alone. It's like a One-on-One with Michael, sort of, because he's recorded himself directing you in a one-on-one session. I got the gist of it after listening to it once or twice and so I do the sessions by myself now.