Welcome to the Support Subforum

Hi all,

I've been going through this TMS for a year and a month; probably longer if you take into account the anxiety and depression that I've had mostly my whole life. So glad I found out about TMS. It really answers a lot! Going through this, family and friends just kept asking me what was wrong and why I wasn't getting better. I kept on replying back each time I went to a new doctor, surgeon, alternative therapy...what they told me, but my "diagnosis" would change constantly. I know you all can relate. I'm reading a lot to gain knowledge, journaling, meditating, exercising, and I think I'm improving, but my thoughts can change in an instant! I'll be reading a book, and it focuses on "back pain" and other things. If I don't see what I'm suffering from in black and white, my mind goes back to negative thoughts. I joined a bunch of support groups, but I am very careful about not reading about symptoms! That is the last thing I need is to read about people's symptoms because I'm trying not to focus on symptoms. It's unproductive, and it's dangerous!

Anyway, I'm really trying to understand what's happened to me and uncover my emotions. I know it has to be a cumulative thing especially with me. Apparently, this wasn't just one event from my childhood that made me this way. I have many many childhood and adult stressors, so I think I stuffed many repressed memories in. Journaling, I am discovering that I never let my emotions out. I cannot imagine having any of my kids going through what I did, so I talk to my inner child a lot.

I really think I have TMS, but listening to symptoms in books and videos, they mostly talk about back pain and other symptoms that I don't have. This is my biggest obstacle.

 

Hi Goldy, and Welcome,

I'm glad you're using TMS healing. It seems, at least from what you've said that you fall into this category, based especially on non-certain or changing diagnoses.

I don't think you mentioned what symptoms you do have. This is probably not important for your involvement here, and you're right on to not focus on the specifics. The causes and the treatments are the same, regardless of symptoms. But feel free to ask and clarify, perhaps see if someone else here can give you examples of their experience with the same symptoms --just to encourage you.

Reading success stories and substituting your symptoms for the ones mentioned can be very effective. I know in the beginning for me, I wanted real specificity to match my symptoms, to support my acceptance of TMS. Looking back I realize that the symptoms were my focus because this is what I had presented to so many physicians! TMS work moves us toward not attending to symptoms, as you have suggested...

There are programs at the Wiki including the Structured Education Program and Alan Gordon's. Both are great!

Andy

 

Hello everyone. Newbie here - I'm really sure that TMS is at the root of my sciatica and back pain as I have tried EVERYTHING except steroid injections and surgery. The whole gamut of medicines, exercises, equipment, holistic treatments with all sorts of different practitioners has made no difference at all to my pain. Even 'herbal' remedies have not touched my pain level. So to me it's pretty obvious I'm a prime candidate for TMS. I do have a question though - having read books by the 'big three', John Sarno, David Schechter and Steve Ozanich, and I'm into week 2 of David Schecter's journalling exercise, my pain has got progressively WORSE - reaching the worst pain I think I've ever had yesterday. I'm thinking it's my brain being particularly resistant and making my pain worse to 'stop' me from pursuing this programme. Would anyone agree with this please?

 

Thank you @JanAtheCPA I was sure that's what it was, increasing my pain and I am on day 10 of David Schechter's programme, so bang on the money with the timing! I'll keep at it, my pain actually made me laugh as it was so transparently my brain trying to make me believe I am worse, rather than me actually getting worse!

 

@Goldy I'm new here too, but completely identified with you saying that you don't let your emotions out and you've hidden them to protect your kids. This was me too, powered through a lot of stuff to make sure the kids didn't suffer. I can't see it much matters what symptoms you have - dealing with all this should keep you healthy forever after all this! Good luck to you xx

 

Good luck to you too!

 

Hi- I fit all the classic signs of TMS and believe in the program 100%. I saw a TMS Dr in July who confirmed that I am a classic case! I have had every masquerading symptom possible in my 69 years and have also tried many surgeries, medications, specialists to no avail. I fit the personality profile to a tee. I completed Dr. Schechter’s mind body workbook in July and August and have read many, many books. In August I started seeing a therapist and revisited the TMS MD. The symptom that has sidelined me is my back and butt pain that 4 laminectomies didn’t touch. It only hurts when I walk or stand. This past October I broke my foot in 8 places and couldn’t walk (bear weight) for 4 weeks. I had no pain in that month! As soon as I started being able to walk, still in my leg cast boot, the pain returned! The month on the sofa I really worked on the emotional underpinnings of my pain. I’m not getting better and I’m so discouraged. In those moments I admit that I start thinking about all the “problems” identified in my MRIs and start to have doubts. I’m back to journaling as that seemed to help. I know this is the answer but want to make more progress!

 

Hi Annabelle,

Welcome to the Forum, and good luck in your healing. I understand your discouragement lately.

I want to point out that this is great evidence that you have TMS. How else can the pain "go away?" So I would contemplate this deeply, reminding yourself of this positive change.

I have seen several cases where when there is another issue --sickness, injury, emotional event, the on-going TMS symptom goes away. I think of it as "what was the new injury or event distracting me from?" in a pure Sarno way. You might find this helpful.

You might look at Alan Gordon's program listed at the top of the page, which is especially cognitive, and makes great suggestions about fear. One suggestion in this realm is to practice self-reassuring statements. I recommend this along with the psychodynamic work with the counselor (and Dr. Schubiner's workbook).

I suggest patience, finding pleasure in things, social activities, meaningful activities ----and know that you're not doing anything wrong at this point. Sometimes it just takes some more time. Feeling there is more we need to do or that we're "doing it wrong" only adds more inner tension/pressure and is not helpful.

Andy

 

Thank you Andy!

 

Hi Everyone, My name is Kathyd.
I just tired to post above, so I will post here.
I am glad there is a website for folks like me to come to. I suffer from severe throbbing anal rectal pain. I cannot sit at all.
Even lying on my butt hurts..I have suffered for over a decade. My pain began with bladder issues (problems feeling empty) and also urinary frequency. After a few years of too much research and too many doctors with upsetting comments or lack of knowledge, I then developed sit bone pain. After trying many things my pain worsened, and eventually moved to the anal area. I became fixated on finding a way to get rid of my pain. It became all I think about. I The pain controls me. I want to take the control back! I I read Ezer's story and totally saw myself ! (Our stories are similar in some ways.) I have read Dr Sarnos's books in the past, but didn't gave the process a good try. After reading your website, I am convinced that my issues are somatic in nature. My pain began a year after losing my dad, whom I was very close to. I am not sure how to truly feel my emotions in my body but I really want to learn. There is much more to my story. I am really looking forward to meeting you folks online and learning how I can put the TMS strategy into practice.
Thanks for creating this site!

 

Hi Kathyd,

Welcome to the Forum and Wiki! You understand so many important things about your situation already. It is not physical, it started with emotional events, the location moved, the more you tried to treat it, the worse it has gotten. These four items are all a good start of a list of "why I know I have TMS."

I suggest you undertake a support program like the Structured Education Program, Alan Gordons Pain Recovery program ---both free on the Wiki. Or Dr. Howard Schubiner's Unlearn Your Pain workbook. Or whatever you're called to do to deepen your practice.

Yes, many have come here who suffered under the doubt that "my pain is not that described by Dr. Sarno." It is great when we really get that TMS can cause pain in any part of the body. This is what the Good Doctor has said.

I suggest you read a success story each day (one of the subforums listed above) as part of your self-treatment.

Ask questions, post your thinking on line, go as deeply as possible to make this information yours.

By "sensing into your body" as you journal or during the day, or in meditation, your real feelings will become easier to access. A gentle approach can work because it is your loving aim to understand yourself, to be with yourself. Just the act of asking to know and feel more opens inner doors.

Andy

 

Thank you Andy for the welcome and the suggestions! I have to learn to navigate my way through this site, and also, how to "feel the emotions" in my body.I will keep reading the suggestions here, My physical therapist has suggested daily mediation for me, as she feels it is something I can do to calm the brain's neural pathways and diffuse the "PTSD" that I have due to fear of my pain, ( or fear of future pain). We also think my ordeal started in 2006 maybe due to grief over my dad's death (in 20050..He was my "rock"my emotional support person. My husband is very good but not the empathetic type, so I don't have the emotional support I had and have needed more than ever . Pudendal nerve pain or whatever this is, is sooo excruziating that it's hard to think of anything else but finding pain relief . Ezer will attest to that. But I do believe the pain go awy..
BTW I am no expert at meditation. It's hard for me, but I have a CD I that helps, so I will listen to that.. BTW what do I journal about? Thanks again!

 

I tried to post another reply but I got an error message. I will start with Alan's link above.... Thanks again!

 

Hi Kathyd,

There are journaling prompts in the SEP, and if you Google "tmswiki journaling" you will find discussions and a Wiki page How Do I Journal?"

I suggest the main point of journaling is to explore, inquire into and feel/allow emotional experiences which may be just below the surface.

Another aspect of journaling is that it cognitively connects what you're feeling to TMS theory and to your learning. The SEP linked responses which are posted in the Forum are a good example of this latter aspect: participants mentioning insights/connections/questions about their emotional learning. There are a lot of Ah Ha moments.

https://www.tmswiki.org/forum/forums/structured-educational-program.16/ (Structured Educational Program)