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Hi Guest, Alex, and North Star,

This is a great discussion and it goes to the heart of "how much do I have to feel?" Thanks Alex for your response, especially about the utilitarian outlook which can cloud real feeling! What I hear you saying is that parts of us really want to be felt, regardless of the outcome about pain. That is my experience too.

I wanted to add another piece that I was taught and use: Feel into the "nothing there." Explore the "dead spot" gently, allowing yourself to go there as much as you can (with compassion) tolerate. Without believing there "should be more feeling!"

I have seen so many times that simply exploring numbness or distance or "blank feelings" reveals the next layer of feeling. By being exactly where we are, there is a natural unfoldment. Also, being with the numbness is a gentle way of self intimacy in itself, regardless of outcome.

Andy B.