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Katrina I was there, I had to realize I had the power to do this, to take back control one minute at a time. I would repeat over and over the words peace, love and joy in my mind hundreds of time a day to keep my mind in the now and to fight the fear, the inner chatter and the anxiety.
As the minutes turned into hours and then days I kept repeating those words whether I felt them or not. I would imagine I felt them and over time I began to be more mindful of being in the now, safe, less fearful because that inner chatter was ringing kind words to my mindbody instead of the angered and fearful words I had been programmed too.
I also repeated I'm calm, relaxed, patient and confident over and over and still do until this day. I found these words relaxed my nervousness and eventually calmed my sensitization.
Walking outside just to see the sun shine was new to me. Taking time to really listen to a loved one and spending time really enjoying the things I had taken for granted was like opening a new door of healing that overwhelmed me. Being grateful for the little I did have and mindful in the moment were priceless, still are.
Learning to heal is like learning to become a child again, we were always excited about what the day could bring and we created our joy in any way we could, you will win, the time is in the now. Smile, your closer than you think.
Bless you