Day 1 A new beginning

I guess I am scared, 30 years of life being controlled by the fear of pain.

I can just about remember what it was like to be free and not worried all time.

I am a fearful of this not working but also fearful of what it is I have been avoiding for such a long time.

I believe deep down I know I have TMS symptoms but am I just wishing for a better life that cannot be?

Chris

 

Hi Chris. It's day 1 for me too.

I'm also a little scared of another disappointment but excited to get started having listened to John Sarno's The Divided Mind on audiobook.

Good luck with your recovery!

 

Hey Chris, I know what you mean about being afraid of what the TMS is trying to hide. Really, what can be so bad that hiding it justifies all this never ending pain? Really though, I think it will feel much to get whatever it is out in the open so we can finally heal.

 

As said to me on Day 1 of this program....there is great value in role playing in private, the scenes from your past of great anguish, and letting the person who hurt you the most know every last feeling from your heart. Hold nothing back.

In the beginning I did not know who this was...now I do. You will too.

 

Hi Chris and Danielhg, Welcome to the structured educational program subforum! Hope that you find the subforum to be a helpful place to talk openly about your experience with TMS and hear from others who are familiar with the program and diagnosis

Fear is a very normal response in starting this program (and may pop up again and again as you work towards recovery). As Alan Gordon writes the TMS Recovery Program: "Your TMS symptoms themselves aren’t serving as a distraction from painful unconscious emotions, it’s the fear and preoccupation around the pain that is serving as this distraction. That’s the purpose of the pain in most cases, to generate fear....Consequently, every one of those pain-themed fear thoughts is actually serving to reinforce the pain." Fear of the program not working (or working and bringing up difficult feelings), is the pain doing its 'job.' It may even increase at points throughout the program. It is wonderful that you are already noticing the fear around the pain... as The Recovery Program states, "Shining a light on this type of thinking brings it to conscious awareness, and it is the first step to diminishing the power of these thoughts." Being knowledgeable about TMS and aware of how your fear is connected to your pain is a huge step moving forward.

I wish you all the best as you continue with the program!
Emily

 

Thank you and best of luck to you too.

 

I am sure this is the case.

Thank you