Day 15 Day 15

During the past two weeks has your pain been moving around? How has this affected your belief in the diagnosis

Yes! I have had a constant rotating cast of symptoms. I won’t bother describing them, it doesn’t matter. Every time they shift I feel a little bit of fear, but I’m slowly learning to not worry so much. It’s really slow, though. I still feel the feelings of “but why do we have to keep doing this,” and fear that it will never go away, etc. The disappointment of a certain presentation of symptoms coming back after being gone for a while can be hard to take, but it’s not so crushing as it used to be, and I’m forcing myself to get less attached to the good days or moments.

But from what I understand, the symptoms you have are pretty random and not dependent on anything, certainly not anything structural or any activity I've been doing. If there is a reason for them, it’s psychological and has to do with what I’m feeling. For instance, I was just journaling about a friendship I feel very torn up about and feeling a marked increase in symptoms, where before that when I was just sitting and playing guitar the symptoms were very mild.