Day 25 Check in

So far I feel like I have made some really nice progress. I started doing some basic yoga again! I am weeding/gardening and doing laundry! I am working on decreasing the fear of my neck/back pain,identifying the triggers, managing my emotions and learning how to change my thinking (increasing postive thoughts).

I still feel a ton of tension in my neck and get pain in my back/shoulders a few times a day, although I usually know exactly what stressor is causing it. I flare up when I am faced with stress or a conflict (even if it is really small). Hopefully, this will all go away sometime soon! I feel like I know what is causing my pain but I can't find a way to fully stop it/manage it. Journaling, mediating and reading has definitely helped though. I really wish Dr. Sarno was still seeing patients. I think a big part of me needs to hear it face to face, that I am going to be okay and that I do indeed have TMS. I looked into some pactitioners on this WIKI but they were all so expensive...

 

Hi Tink, I understand what you say about figuring out the cause/trigger and then struggling with total Pain elimination. It seems other people have an 'aha breakthrough.

 

Hi Tink,
While I had an aha breakthrough at the beginning, I continue to have a continual numbness/weakness in my knees and occasional hints of pain. I realized that while I've shifted from looking to the medical community for answers, I ended up still looking externally from myself for answers. The other day I did a "take" on the journaling and wrote from the perspective of my knee. It was an interesting experience because I received some (maybe subconscious) guidance that I wasn't listening to her (my knee) well. She told me that in my attempt to "cure" and "fix" the pain, I had ignored deep cries from within. The main message I received was to be patient, that the hidden parts that I had ignored for so long needed time to unfold within me. It was a wakeup call to listen within much more strongly than I've been doing. And I'm a long time meditator, so I was really fooling myself thinking that I was present for all of this pain. I just share all this incase any of it resonates with you. Best wishes in your healing process.