Day 1 Relapse X-mas 2014

Trying to be fully present here. So these are the feelings I am having right now. I am in the middle of another TMS relapse.

I am riding a tms relapse that is conditioned by the thanksgiving and christmas holiday.
I get triggered by this time of the year for some reason. Loudon Wainright's III song "Suddenly its Christmas" is something I can identify with.

I need support to remind myself that its TMS.

I have been living with this pain for so long that when it comes it requires reprogramming to get through.
I am a father with 2 kids and I recriminate myself when ever it comes since I feel guilty for the extra strain in places on my wife.

I am my worst enemy and I need to help with giving myself TLC. Any suggestions are welcome and appreciated.

I wish everyone the powers of discernment and relentless curiosity as you struggle with similar pain.

Thankful I found this forum.

 

I am new to TMS but I can certainly understand the issue of a relapse during the holidays. I would just say be gentle with yourself. You've just been through and rough period and it may take a little time to come out of it. It sounds like you have insight and wisdom about the causes and your feelings. That says a lot about your resilience and ability to bounce back.

 

Velo Drew! So glad you're here. You may be your "worst enemy" but you're now learning how to be your Best Friend. I know its hard when the TMS is triggered but believe that its on the run… just by naming it out loud here to the forum, you're disengaging its power. And YES! I am sooo happy that the holidays are over. I had to deal with TMS symptoms also. I know that next year will be easier because I'll be that much better.

 

Velo Drew: I hear you. The Holidays seems to be the time when there is the greatest gap between the ideal and the real, a crisis point for brewing up a perfect TMS storm of ache and regret. I've always found that if I can make it to New Year, things invariably start getting better. Hope the same is true in your own particular case.

 

Thanks for the beautiful support Bruce, Sanghagirl, Forest, nowtime.


I am not letting the current relapse dominate my life.
Instead I am trying to really stay present, go to the Gym, and do my Sarno journaling, reading some poems, star trek, argy bargy by Squueze and paris review.

This time I am sort of awe struck at how clever this edition of TMS is. I have back pain pretty strong nerve pain in my leg and some in my knee.
Time to kick this crap to the curb. Sha na na, sha na na goodbye tms.

I am in pain but not crushed. I am grateful I found this forum.

Many blessings,
Andrew