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The Presence Process - Share Experiences & Ask Questions

Discussion in 'Community Off Topic' started by BrianC, Jul 14, 2014.

  1. BrianC

    BrianC Well known member

    Thanks for sharing, Morreion. I'm sorry to hear you're having a hard time, but it's totally understandable. Abuse really does a number on kids, and dissociation is about all out can do when you can't overpower the adult.

    Did you dissociate to the point of becoming multiple? If so, there are methods for fully healing from that. Heck, you end up better than if you hadn't endured the abuse, oddly enough, because all of your health problems go away after the therapy is done and you're fully integrated.

    For now, you could consider speaking to the part of you that's been triggered each time and is on the surface as a result. View it as a small child and tell it that they're just emotions and they can't kill you. Love on the child unconditionally as it feels the emotions. The feeling of unconditional love actually counteracts the emotional pain quite a bit. The more you feel the emotions without distracting from them, the better you get at it and the more pleasant it feels when you experience them. We don't do it perfectly every time and we always mess up since none of us are perfect, and that's okay. It's expected and completely normal. We just do the best we can and keep moving forward. Emotions aren't good or bad. They're indicators of our state of being at the moment. They're helpful. But the more we fear and avoid them, the more they run our life, controlling us. Sounds like you're working on staying present with them, but I don't know if you're loving on each child that comes up when you get triggered and speaking gently and lovingly to it to reparent it. Sharing the truth with it helps a ton, too, and allowing it to express its emotions.

    Hope that helps. If you have ever seen an inside world or you lose time or hear voices (of alternate personalities) inside, let me know. We can see if you're multiple and then I can give you some ideas for how you might proceed.
     
  2. Kalo

    Kalo Well known member

    Hi Brian...I have never done TPP...But to me it sounds like Carl Jung Shadow Work...The question I have is I have begun doing breathwork via an app call Pace Breathing...You can program it and any speed and for lengths....I have been doing that for 15 min....

    My question is.....I am horrible book reader, and I have begun to do breathwork and when I am done, I try to see what emotions surface and just try to feel them without judgement...Also, if I get triggered from someone, I try to feel it and ask myself what does this remind me of...I try to see if it goes back to my childhood...

    So, is this TTP in a nutshell? You sound awesome in it...You have lots of experience...I am still trying to intergrade my emotions..

    Thanks, Kalo
     
  3. BrianC

    BrianC Well known member

    Thanks for sharing and for the question!

    You're doing something very similar to one part of TPP.

    TPP breathing is about 1 or 1.5 seconds inhale and the same length out. Equal length breaths through only the nose or only the mouth, but never in one and out the other. And you say, "I am here now in this," in your head (not out loud). You say one word of the sentence as you inhale, and the next as you exhale. That's programming yourself to stay in the moment and causing your mind to stop so it's not keeping repressed emotions repressed. So it's similar to what you're doing. But again, that's only part of the process.

    The other parts of TPP involve a few more things. The book is on audiobook if you want to listen to the first part of it. I think it's 100 pages or so until you get to the process. Then you just read a few pages each day after you do the minimum 15 mins of breathing. The reading helps reprogram your heart/subconscious. You also repeat a different phrase in your head all week, as much as you can remember to keep repeating it throughout the day, which is just more reprogramming your subconscious/heart.

    There's also a point at which you do breathing while in a hot bath. As you do that, it really helps awaken your bodily feelings. I liked doing those.

    One thing that's really important is to learn to not just feel your uncomfortable emotions without judgment, but to actually love them unconditionally. TPP defines unconditional love as unconsitional attention and unconditional acceptance. That's a great start, but there's more to it than that. You feel the uncomfortable emotions/feelings with loving fondness. You can just feel the emotions/feelings at first, but at some point you want to feel thankful and fond and loving toward the emotions, as if each one is a little kid who's hurting and needs a loving parent to comfort them. That's the quickest way to help them heal.

    TPP works great for a lot of people. But for some people, like me, it can only get them so far. It was great when I did it...five times in a row. lol It's one of the best things that ever happened to me. My subconscious is a bit more stubborn. It doesn't simply just trust me or anyone else. It needs its beliefs disproved and the new beliefs proved to it before its ready to make a change. So I had to develop another method to use to reprogram my subconscious. Technically, I'd already developed a lot of it before I started TPP, which put development on hold for a few years.

    Hope that's helpful. Let me know if you have more questions. Good luck!
     
  4. Kalo

    Kalo Well known member

    Hey Brian,

    Thanks so much for your description of the Presence Process.

    To be honest, I am hesitant in doing the Presence Process. I have heard that it is simple to understand, but, I have read that the people who do it, again not all, are worst off emotionally afterwards.

    I am certain it s because the technique he teaches is powerful or could it be that Michael Brown has bestowed some magical voodoo to make his Presence Process so powerful it like taking some kind of ayahuasca all at once.

    I know my demons...We all have a divinity and a shadow as Carl Jung put it. I do a connective breathing to bring up my emotions and I am starting realize that NO emotions are wrong...I have started to a meditation similar to vipassana where you scan your body and feel what is going on.. You start from your head to toe...You don't judge what is going on in your body while doing the meditative scan.

    It is not always easy in trying to feel emotions cause we have learned to suppress them all our lives. But the Process makes me hesitant. I have enough on my plate with what life is giving me know that I don't want to me worst off afterwards.

    My problem is dealing with people who abusively do bad things to me. I don't lash out, and I learned how to say things back like..."I want you to know what you just did made me feel"...

    But at what point does anyone stay in a relationship with verbal abuse or friends and or family that try to drag you into man made drama. Life gives enough drama..

    Even Michael Brown stated in one of his videos that if anyone tells you they never get triggered after doing this process, they are lying...

    I don't mind being taught how to feel my emotions, but, I am not sure if his work would benefit me in the state I am in right now and even saying this makes me feel like I am a chicken or maybe don't want to heal even though I do.

    Your awesome and I really appreciate your efforts in helping..

    Kalo
     
    Last edited: Jul 1, 2020
  5. BrianC

    BrianC Well known member

    Hey, no problem, Kalo! I enjoy answering questions.

    Your concerns are well founded. There's no voodoo that makes emotions worse with TPP. The process itself begins by you setting your intention to have emotions surface so you can process them. Setting that intention consciously can and does get into the subconscious. And if the subconscious feels safe enough to let its repressed uncomfortable emotions surface because it has confidence in you to be able to process and integrate them now, it will start bringing them to the surface. And for some people, they have some really rough emotions deep down that are really tough to handle once they surface. So they'll back out of the process. That's no problem at all and completely understandable. Each person has to take care of him or herself and they know what they can and can't handle.

    Also, there's the possibility that some people's subconscious is trying to sabotage them by bringing up lots of horrible emotions all at once in order to crush the person so they'll back out of the process. Some people's subconscious is exceptionally clever and will do things like that to keep the repression and or punish the person due to self-hate.

    One of my favorite verses in the Bible is Ecclesiastes 1:18 - With much wisdom comes much sorrow, the more knowledge, the more grief.

    I didn't understand that verse until I realized our painful situations and emotions in life are what teach us the most. And once I started to learn from the emotions and enjoy the painful ones, I truly understood the deep nature of that verse. But that doesn't mean it's easy at first. It's a tough road and we have to take it at our own safe pace. Everyone's different. No need to judge yourself as if you're a coward. I'd probably feel the same way if I decided not to do it because I have shame patterns programmed into my heart that I haven't fully integrated yet. But I know those are just false truths I learned as a kid. I know that's not true about me and I suspect you know it's not true about you either. You're just being smart about your healing by pacing yourself so yuu don't get overwhelmed. That's a great tactic. I'd do the same. Getting overwhelmed is only good in certain situations regarding healing, but it's rarely needed or a positive thing. If a person is trying to stop being afraid of the overwhelmed feeling, that'd be a useful time to practice feeling it.

    I agree with you--emotions aren't good or bad. They simply "are."

    I learned something kind of similar to vipassana a few years ago from an very nice old Hindu Indian man who teaches it sometimes. The main thing he taught me to do was to relax all of my muscles one by one before starting my meditation. He said I'd really enjoy mediation if I did that. And he was right. Learning to relax all my muscles makes meditation a lot more enjoyable. So I incorporated it into my breathing in the morning. I eventually developed a grouping method for relaxing my muscles more quickly so I don't have to go through every single muscle. That helped. I got out of practice a while back and now when I do it, my mind has a hard time focusing. That's okay. It's partly because I've made it down to my repressed anger. Anger loves to distract.

    You sound like you're on the right track.

    I can't remember if I asked you about multiple personality disorder, but if I didn't, you're welcome to private message me about it if you think it might be a concern.

    Thanks so much for your posts!
     
  6. Sita

    Sita Well known member

    This is a very interesting thread that I recently discovered. I really appreciate it. Thanks Brian!
    (I'm processing some of the concepts now, I might have some questions in the future).

    Take care.
     
  7. BrianC

    BrianC Well known member

    Welcome to the thread, Sita! I look forward to any questions you might have or anything you might care to share about your experiences. It's always interesting and helpful to hear what others experience.

    So glad you posted. Good luck!
     
  8. Kalo

    Kalo Well known member

    Hi Brian, So by multiple personality meaning...Do you mean do I think I am someone else? Like I am Kalo, but maybe tomorrow, I am Alexis and or do I hear different voices in my head? If that is what you mean by multiple personalities?? Then, no, I do not have that disorder..

    One more other thing...Which is scary....I have started to read about the dangers of Carl Jung and his BS collective unconscious.....Here is what is discovered...I am not starting to wonder if this hole shadow work which closely resembles Michael Brown's work....Could tapping into this make one even more stressed....By trying to understand myself, seriously made more troubles of more pain.. Take a look at this https://www.hgi.org.uk/resources/delve-our-extensive-library/interviews/mysterious-jung-his-cult-lies-he-told-and-occult (The mysterious Jung: his cult, the lies he told, and the occult)

    He is basically saying with his research on Jung that he invented the collective unconscious and archetypes basically as a way of reintroducing Hellenistic cosmology,

    Basically this man who researched Jung found out that he lied and wanted to make religion out of his false concepts...

    Not sure if this is true.....This is just Dr. Richard Noll's opinion....I try to take it with a grain of salt...Just found it interesting.
    Kalo
     
    Last edited: Jul 1, 2020
  9. BrianC

    BrianC Well known member

    Yeah, people with Multiple Personality Disorder (MPD/DID) will often, around age 30, start hearing the voices of their alternate personalities (called "alters"), or start losing time (switching to other alters and being blanked out while the other alters are out in the body). Glad to hear you don't have it. It's not pleasant to put up with.

    No, TPP isn't anything like Carl Jung's stuff. I think Brown might believe in the collective unconscious but I don't recall it being part of TPP.

    While we're human, I don't believe we have a collective unconscious. But in tons of the hundreds of thousands of near-death experiences psychologists have recorded, if the person goes to a heaven-like place where God is, they say there consciously connected with everyone while going through the Life Review. That's the only evidence I've seen that makes me believe we may have a collective consciousness once we get back to Heaven. Honestly, I think focusing on collective unconscious would be pointless for anyone to do since I don't see ay evidence of it being true while we're human. And that includes the bogus Hundreth Monkey Effect. I've read the study and nothing about it resembles the bogus claims of the Hundreth Monkey theory. And scientists have explained in other write-ups that the person who started that idea admitted that he was basically lying about it, but he masked it by saying he just meant it figuratively, I think. I forget his name.

    And in regard to my method, the individual using it is the one who decides what beliefs he or she is going to program into their subconscious. When I get around to writing the method in a book, I'll share my beliefs and the logical arguments to use with the subconscious to convince it that they really are true. Then people can choose my beliefs or their own or a mix. It's up to them. The only warning I'll give is to make sure the beliefs the person is programming in are actually loving and not just seemingly loving on the surface. My beliefs are as loving as can be and very logical, and they should produce the best results for health and happiness. Oh, and there's one other warning I'll give: don't just believe my beliefs because you're reading my book--really think about them, do your own research for and against my beliefs, and come to your own conclusion about them. Since there's so much disinformation out there and arguments that seem accurate on the surface, all I ask is that if a person wants to learn my beliefs, learn them well and learn how to properly defend them before trying to disprove them. That way, they'll be more likely able to spot the illogical arguments against my beliefs that may otherwise seem legitimate. I'm not interested in convincing people that my beliefs are correct. I'm interested in sharing what I believe and the logic and evidence behind those beliefs, and teaching people to think for themselves instead of just trusting my beliefs or others beliefs. Otherwise, they're allowing themselves to be brainwashed without me even trying to brainwash them.

    If you want a really funny, deep speaker, look up Anthony DeMello's 8 hr Awareness workshop recording (just audio) from one of his weekend retreats back in the 80s. It's hilarious and there's a lot of great insights. I don't agree with him on everything, of course, but he's accurate about most things. He was both a priest and a psychologist, but after he died, the Vatican said he didn't represent their beliefs (which is a good thing, lol).

    Maybe that answers your questions. I honestly don't like Jung. I wouldn't be surprised if what Dr. Noll said about him is true. I've suspected for a while that Jung may have been a Jesuit or Freemason, but I don't think I've ever seen any definite evidence/proof for that, so I've just left it alone. There's some high-level corruption in psychology. Heck, even Freud figured out eventually that the group of fellow psychologists he met with regularly manipulated and controlled him for some larger neferious plan according to him. I didn't read the book because my friend who'd just read it gave me some quick Cliff Notes version, sort of.

    Have a great night!
     
  10. Kalo

    Kalo Well known member

    Very insightful things you are writing...I will look into the Anthony DeMello's workshop you are talking about.

    I have been listening to a lot of Michael Brown's workshop and I am really understanding what this work is about. I am trying to feel every emotional trigger without reacting physically, but, when it happens, I feel into my body and breath deeply to feel the emotional pain. I find myself asking before doing this, like when was the last time I felt this way pointless because I know it all stems back to my childhood and my family life.

    What I would like and I am fine with trying to integrate emotions, however, what do you do when a family member steeped into NEW AGE BS, wants to talk about it to you all day along...Did I attract that person in my life??? She loves the GURU's, but, I see right through their lies and do no want anymore to do with it that...No more meditating for BS enlightenment. I never thought we came down here to be in 24/7 bliss...

    So, how do I handle her? Do I listen to her and pretend because that is what I am doing to not hurt her feelings? I have found that all this NEW AGE stuff did to anyone is mask their feelings and think positive and believe in the guru. Why is this person attracted in wanting to be in my life? Did I feed her needs...

    I love the Presence Process and I am now understanding how every emotions is okay and how to feel them...But it doesn't help on how to deal with people....I don't condemn any who wants to follow a guru or BS enlightenment..

    Though the only way I know how to deal with this person is to cut my conversations short and feel how it all makes me feel and start to pull away...The Presence Process doesn't instruct one what to do. I don't know if I necessarily believe that all triggers will be gone and one can hang out with anyone...

    I do believe it's job is to help you not suppress your emotional trigger..

    Kalo
     
  11. BrianC

    BrianC Well known member

    Sounds like you're in a tough, uncomfortable situation! Sorry to hear that.

    I can't tell you what to do, of course, but I can share some ideas and what I'd probably do.

    Boundaries are very important because as long as we keep our boundaries, we won't allow people in our life whom we feel are crossing those boundaries or are simply not good matches for us as friends.

    So let's say, for example, that one of my boundary is that I don't hang out with people who push their religious views on me or can't stop talking about their religious views. My first move is to make my boundary known to that person.

    I'd say to them in a nice way, "I respect that you have your religious views, but I really don't like New Age, so it's not something I ever want to discuss or hear from my friends. If my friends can respect that boundary of mine by not discussing it, then we're good. But if they keep crossing that boundary, I'll usually cut them off and won't hang out with them anymore, especially if they're trying to push their beliefs in me. I think that's really disrespectful. I'm not saying you're disrespectful because I never told you about this boundary of mine, but I'm telling you now. Does that work for you?"

    Or heck, if I knew they were trying to push their beliefs on me and that they likely wouldn't stop, I'd eventually just tell them that I don't want to hang out anymore.

    I'm usually pretty straightforward with people in as nice a way as I can be, but it's not easy. Part of me doesn't want people thinking badly of me, and part of me doesn't want to hurt others, either. I know that I'm not technically hurting them because whether they're hurt by it or not has to do with their own beliefs and programming and that I have no control over that...but still, part of my subconscious feels responsible. I'm still working with that part of myself so it will stop caring about what other people think of me.

    The less I care about what others think of me, the more authentic and real I'll be around them. For example, if I care about what they think of me, I'll always have to modify my behavior to suit them, so I'm being fake. That's a disservice to them and especially to myself. But if I don't care what they think, I don't have to "act" different than my authentic self around them. Instead, I can be real. I can be me. And honestly, most people really love when their friends are real and authentic rather than modifying their behavior to appease others. Authentic people are awesome. I'm always impressed with them. Fun to hang out with.

    I wouldn't want to avoid a person's calls or texts, though, because that's disrespectful and can really blow up in my face. lol So that's why I have to tell them my boundaries and then tell them when they've crossed one. Then I can make a clean cut if they can't respect my boundaries. It kind of like self-hate when we hang around people who aren't healthy for us. It's like abuse to ourselves. Why would we subject ourselves to that abuse? (abuse is a little too extreme a word, for it, maybe, but you get my point) I decided at some point that I would be kind to myself by no longer hanging around anyone who didn't know how to respect me and other people properly. Those relationships are toxic. How can my heart trust me if I don't protect it from people like that?

    I believe what Michael Brown was saying in TPP was that you eventually won't get triggered by people who used to trigger you once you process and integrate the psycho-emotional cause in your subconscious. I'd say it like this: I need to shift or integrate the emotions, and reprogram the false belief causing the uncomfortable emotions. Then, I won't be triggered anymore because there's no longer a belief to trigger. But notice one thing Michael Brown didn't say? He didn't say you have to hang out with people who used to trigger you. He just said they won't trigger you anymore when you do happen to see them. I seriously doubt he'd recommend staying in a toxic relationship with someone.

    Now, I'll share with you one more thing that I might do. But this is just me. If I get the sense that my friend might actually listen to reason because he or she really does search for the truth instead of just whatever makes them feel better, then I might share information with them about the roots of Luciferianism and how that's where New Age came from. I'd show how the beliefs of the founders of New Age actually line up with the Nazis' beliefs perfectly. However, it's highly unlikely that I'd do that because my general rule is to let people believe what they want and do go destroying their beliefs unless they honestly want me to challenge them and are asking me questions about beliefs and what I think about them. Each friendship is different because each person is different, so I have to feel out situations like that and decide what's best. It's not my job to change people's beliefs--that's God's prerogative and He's way, way better at that than me. Besides, if I convinced someone of my beliefs and then 10 years down thr road I find out that my beliefs are wrong, then I basically convinced that person of false beliefs and they followed those false beliefs for 10 years. They likely won't believe me when I tell them I was wrong, because that's the same as saying they're wrong since they still hold those beliefs. Just gets into a mess, really. lol

    I don't know I'd that helped or not, but hopefully it did! lol
     
  12. Kalo

    Kalo Well known member

    Great advise for sure. Many times when I told this person how I felt in a very nice way, she hung up on me...Then denied anything she did. Its funny, how NEW AGE Religion teaches one to loose the ego, but, she can't even admit when she hurts someone. It is almost gaslighting...But this is very good advise...

    I am learning to become more straight forward. I am a recovering "do gooder" and what you are saying is exactly me...I don't want anyone to think badly me either, LOL....Again, when I have tried to tell this person how her actions made me feel or not wanting to talk about the NEW AGE religion, she either hangs up on me or yells at me. I try to forgive, and then that family members comes right back in my life and acts like nothing happens. She really isn't related to me family wise, she is my cousin's mother in law. Why she keeps calling me or coming into my life I don't know. I did try out NEW AGE for a short while and like I said I could see the FALSE BS in it. I think if I learn to feel the uncomfortable part that she might hang up on me if I tell her the truth, and learn to know that not everyone can like me...I will become more authentic...

    BTW, my TMS is TMJ its funny because TMJ is effecting my jaw my mouth to open, LOL....You see maybe I am not speaking my truth because of being afraid to hurt someone, but, I am not doing anything good for me in doing that and not even for her...

    I AGREE with everything you have stated....Lots of people don't know what they are getting into with NEW AGE.

    Seriously, your advise should be posted somewhere on the board because relationship problems such as what I stated above does and can make a person sick when they can't be their authentic self. You have described it beautifully....

    If we can learn to feel our emotions and do the change to unprogram the subconscious mind we do become more authentic and we don't have to search for outside things to bring happiness....

    Thank you Brian...Seriously, for taking the time to answer my post....You have great insight, but more important you answer authentically :0
     
  13. BrianC

    BrianC Well known member

    No problem! Thanks for asking the questions. I like these types of questions and conversations. And it's great to know that my answers feel authentic, too. :)

    I really like that you see through New Age and have good insight into your situation and self. You have some very good wisdom there.

    Let us know how it goes with your relative! It's always great to hear people's experiences.
     
  14. morreion

    morreion New Member

    No didn't become a multiple, not to my knowledge or experience, only had several times episodes of missing time, for instance going on my bike and ending somewhere else end having no recollection of how i got there.

    Am trying to do that now. Am having a grate counselor who helps me doing this. The counselor himself went through trauma so he has a good understanding. For some reason i can stay more present as some emotions arise. It's now predominantly anger, which is very hard to stay present with but am getting better with it. If i stay long enough with the anger, i start to feel sadness underneath it.

    Feels like i'm going through a period of feeling till it gets to strong and fall back to smoking cigarettes and if i don't do that i feel myself drifting away and get absent (dissociate). And then the next time i feel i can stay more present again and the emotions are getting stronger.

    It's like a spiral. Each time i can only feel that much till it gets to strong, followed by a period of suppression and dissociation. But after each sequence, the feelings of presence is stronger and so do the emotions. It's like presence is getting me slowly used to feeling more, if i need to train a muscle.

    I don't do the breathing part of TPP because i did cause to much to surface and felt overwhelmed. I had flashbacks after the breathing exercises, where it surfaced during walks and felt like physically collapsing so felt not safe and my body became so tense i couldn't handle it so slowed it down. In my daily life i have enough triggers that do that for me and try to do the breathing when the emotions arise.

    I do use mindfulness exercises though. But seeing everything in my life as a messenger helps me with dealing emotions and see things as they really are.
     
    Last edited: Jul 3, 2020
  15. BrianC

    BrianC Well known member

    Losing time only happens with multiplicity or schizophrenia. When an alternate personality ("alter" for short) switches into the body, the main personality blanks out. The alter walks a mile away to a grocery story and suddenly she gets scared and goes back inside. When that happens, the main personality comes back out and finds herself in the grocery story with no idea how she got there.

    Since you lost time, you may want to do some searching deep down and try to figure out if you're multiple or have schizophrenia. If a kid is abused before age 8, the trauma can split his or her personality, causing the kid to be multiple. I may have said that to you before but I forget.

    It sounds like you're on the right track and doing well with it. If you find out you're multiple, though, you may want to take an additional approach that's a lot quicker.

    Mind if I ask your age?
     
  16. morreion

    morreion New Member

    Hi Brian, i'm 53 now.

    Have been battling with emotional pain since a young age but i really started to have physical symptoms when i became 19.

    It has been a long journey discovering what was the cause of it all. But since my divorce it really started to kickstart. In my relationship was violence and drug and alcohol use, i mainly used to block out what was happening and slept on the street in order to be save. Think that all caused all the emotional pain to surface.

    It's especially because of dreams that i start to become aware what's happening to me and what it is revealing is indeed repressed emotions and have flashbacks that don't make sense and am in denial that that could be what happened to me. I'm getting counselling and the counselor is saying that the story is not important, the emotions and feelings are. So that's in line with TPP.

    It's a real challenge to stay present and not react. I have my daughter living with me who has serious anger issues and that brings it even more up in me. So at the moment my daughter is my greatest messenger and in one way am grateful that she does bring it up in me among other people.
     
  17. BrianC

    BrianC Well known member

    I'll send you a quick PM, Morreion.
     
  18. faacupereyra

    faacupereyra Newcomer

    Hello everyone, hope You Are all well. I want to share a little bit My experience. I started the process in July, it wasnt very dificult, because i couldnt feel emotions very well. I imagine that's because for being very logical, intelectual and a 'perfectionist'. So in my stupidity i started to do a Lot of breathing sessions all day... Also i stopped following the instructions that Michael says, because i thought that rules didnt work for me. When i tried to connect and embrace My little child at session 6, i didnt have any response or tears, it didnt work .. As i said, i started doing a Lot of breathing until an inmense amount of fear came up and i got really scared. Now i don't now what to do... Don't be like me, follow the instructions so you have a gentle experience.
     
  19. BrianC

    BrianC Well known member

    Hi, Faacupereyra! Thanks so much for posting your experience!

    I see you're experiencing a lot of fear coming up suddenly. That's perfectly normal for some people, actually, so you're doing great! Even if you had followed TPP (The Presence Process) guidelines, this exact same thing may have happened. In fact, it may have taken a lot longer for it to happen if you had only done the minimum breathing each day, so it's possible you did yourself a big favor!

    One person in this thread did quite amazingly, actually. He managed to do something like 3 PPs (Presence Processes) without ANY integrations whatsoever. I guess he had a lot of repression that was really difficult for him to bring up, or maybe his subconscious was really afraid of feeling emotions. Who knows. But he actually stuck it out through all those 30 weeks worth of PPs. Then, I believe he said it was at the end of the 3rd PP or sometime in the 4th PP that he finally had his first integration! That's one of the most impressive examples of persistence and guts I've ever seen with TPP. I don't know if I would've stuck it out so long if I hadn't had my first integration during the 7th week of my first PP.

    So sometimes, it takes a while to see results, and sometimes it doesn't. Maybe you did exactly what you needed to do for your particular situation and that saved you from having to go a lot longer before emotions started surfacing. :)

    Other people have experienced a severe onslaught of fear suddenly in as little as a few days or a week or so in some cases, and they were doing the process exactly as it instructs. Everyone's different.

    If you're having that fear come up, it means it felt safe enough to come up, so that's good. However, fear can make a person truly freak out and think they've done something wrong. It makes them panic sometimes because, well, that's how fear feels. If a person hasn't dealt with a lot of fear, they might immediately run from it and try to get rid of it. I mean, heck, if you're not used to it, it makes sense that you might feel like freaking out and running from the experience. I've seen people do that a few times. Some stick it out, others take a break and try again later. Some are so freaked out that they don't do it again. Each person's different and that's okay. Everyone has to do what they feel is best for them.

    When you feel fear like that, you simply sit with it and feel it. You may feel like your limbs need to shake or other parts of your body. Let them shake. You can even help them shake if you need to. That's what I did when fear came up. It just needed an outlet of expression, so I let it express itself through shaking. Some people shake when they're scared, but I never did that before TPP, so maybe I was repressing it. Once I started TPP, though, I would let my body shake to express it until it passed. While I was going through it, I would embrace myself, my inner child, with unconditionally love and fondness. Not necessarily the entire time, but part of it. Or sometimes it worked better if I waited until after the fear had worked its way out for that session. And usually, I'd feel the fear right after I finished the breathing.

    Eventually, sadness would occur, but not necessarily during that session. Who knows when it would happen, but it would eventually, which means I'd cry. Sometimes, I think I may have cried during the fear. I forget exactly.

    After the sadness, you'll eventually feel an integration occur. Not necessarily right after the sadness, though. Just depends. I often had to listen to music or watch a movie and those might trigger positive emotions which could cause part of my heart to start integrating.

    That's about the best way I can explain how it happened with me. I think I've faced fear so much in my life that it was very easy for me to do it going through TPP. What was hardest for me in TPP was shame. I had some shame attacks because of something stupid I'd done that hurt someone, and I'd feel awful as a result. That told me that one of my biggest problems is caring what other people think about me, but more importantly, that meant that I thought very poorly about myself, which was why I wanted others to think so well of me.

    Hope that helps. Let me know if you need anything! Sounds like you're doing great!
     
  20. faacupereyra

    faacupereyra Newcomer

    Hi BrianC !! First of all, thank you so much for posting, can't imagine how helpfull is for me. Now i feel a little bit more confident when the sensations arise. Last night fear got me pretty good lol. I felt it all over the body and also very painfull sensations in stomach area. All sort of mental stories too (You won't be able to sleep ever again, You Will die, blablabla) and then i tried to let go the story by compassionately saying things mentally like 'is just fear' , 'you are fine, i'm with you', 'is just a sensation'. After a while i was able to feel that sensations without going into panic. Honestly i felt so good, even in pain. Should i sit with the fear until 'dissolves' for that session?
    As You said, for people who has never dealt with a Lot of fear , it can get overwhelming, and funny enough, fear is the emotion that i avoided all My life, i imagined that something was going on there.. i always had trouble with social situations , extremely shy at partys, school,work, trips with people that i don't know very well, having sex, playing sports.
    Thank god that exists something like PP!! It changes so much your perception of everything. So excited to continue this :)
     
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