TMS is not about deeply repressed emotions

I saw the movie Health the other night (it's on Amazon) and it's about self-healing. One of the therapists mentioned existential stressors and the fact that many of us get up and tune into news and other things immediately, while the brain is trying to wake up and get back on line. She mentions trying to meditate first thing in the morning to get your brain to start the day. Perhaps a great idea!

 

The night before last I watched Sheryl Sandberg's new documentary "Screams Before Silence" which is about the mass, brutal sexual abuse by terrorists against hundreds of women on October 7th. I cried and cried and cried (and now I'm crying again.)

 

Haha! Yes, I did awhile ago but not with the 5 whys. I’ll go back to it. And I’ll get my butt out there!

 

I’ll be honest. I gave up news. I know it had a Lot to do with me getting TMS.

 

I've been trying to work up the courage to watch that one.

 

I'm so grateful that they made the film. It is extremely respectfully done and nothing graphic is shown. Despite the fact that I cried buckets I do think it's so very important for people to see it and to know the degree of savagery against women and how sexual violence was used as an act of war. And to not allow a single soul to deny it.

From a TMS perspective for me personally, October 7th -- well more so October 8th, has woken up a sleeping lion on a mountain of generational trauma that I had no idea and would have never, ever expected that I had.

 

I'm kind of the reverse where I feel comforted by knowing the details.
Thank you for your kind words about regaining equanimity.
This is a new road for me to travel upon and there is a lot of good to come from it.

 

Smart lady.

 

Have you seen "Nova" (the Yes Studio documentary)? I haven't yet, but will.

 

I’m so sorry you have to go through all this pain.

 

The treatment of women by men is one on my #1 triggers especially when it involves egotistical power and control. My personal exposure to this at the age of 5 or 6 (which was just the start I remember) has made me incredibly rageful to abuses as subtle as language to more horrific things like sexual violence. I could not watch that film but I absolutely believe this is a tactic of war still being utilized today.

 

I have not. I'll look for it. Thanks.

 

Thank you. It's OK. Awakenings are a good thing.

 

Horrific is the right word for sure.
Sorry that it is all so triggering for you.
In some ways I feel like it should be more triggering for others. The way people are dismissing it. Pretending (or lying) that it didn't happen. Or not caring. Or saying it was justified. That last one is the one that is really eating away at me. Justified? Gang raping and mutilating while murdering hundreds of young girls at a peace music festival or in their homes in front of their families. NO. Not justified! And women's groups around the world being mostly silent. Painful.

The film is basically just interviews with those who were there. Sheryl Sandberg was very courageous to be able to hear story after story after story.
And also one brave woman who was held captive for 50+ days speaks and tells her story.

 

This makes so much sense to me. I've been completely pain free from TN, cluster headaches and migraines for three years and have recently had a flare up because of what I now believe (and knew at the time) is the way I have repressed my emotions in the past few months. I know where my anger, shame and feelings of not being good enough came from and what I need now are strategies to employ to change the way I respond in the moment.