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vulvodynia...looking for reassurance

Discussion in 'Support Subforum' started by pilatesgirl, Jun 28, 2014.

  1. pilatesgirl

    pilatesgirl Peer Supporter

    My biggest obstacle is looking for someone with my exact same symptoms of vulvar/rectal pain that successfully healed with mind/body work. I logically understand that is not helpful or maybe even possible since there are many, many symptoms associated with mind/body syndrome. It's like looking for a needle in a haystack.

    I feel like I am stuck in doubt. I also know this doubt is just disguised as fear.
    How does one get past this? Vulvodynia is a new syndrome and poorly understood. This for some reason makes it difficult for me to trust it is a mind/body syndrome. That is probably why I go back to needing reassurance. Even though reassurance is often fleeting I find it somewhat necessary in the beginning stages.

  2. PaulBlack

    PaulBlack Peer Supporter

    I did a few searches, since this sounded like something that "could be" related to something like levator ani, or the muscles, tendons and nerves that effect the pelvic floor.
    I do not get (for lack of a better term) pain in my ass very often, but it mostly hits me while sleeping at night, (wakes me with a tooth ache in my rectum) As I slowly calm down and do my best to relax away tension, it eases and I fall back to sleep.
    I understand (for myself anyway) that the pelvic floor and much that goes with it, from IBS, prostatitis, aches in my perinium etc. seem to be hard to get a reg medical diagnosis on. This to me has given way for emotions being a culprit.
    Is there a correlation to statements like "bowels in an uproar" or "pain in the ass" and these physical pains? I seem to believe there is.
    pilatesgirl likes this.
  3. Ellen

    Ellen Beloved Grand Eagle


    If you put the term 'vulvodynia' in the search bar in the upper right corner of this page, you will find many threads with people who have had this symptom, including a success story. You are not alone. I hope you find some reassurance in reading posts from others with similar symptoms.

    Best wishes...
    pilatesgirl likes this.
  4. yb44

    yb44 Beloved Grand Eagle

    pilatesgirl likes this.
  5. Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021)

    Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021) Beloved Grand Eagle

    pain and misery love company, but we're all different, so I think it's good to believe 100 percent that our symptom is from TMS and keep working on techniques for healing. Mainly, spend time reflecting on childhood traumatic emotions that cause our pain.

    Also, I like this YouTube video I just discovered, on how to reframe negative emotions to positive:

    pilatesgirl likes this.
  6. Ironoxidered

    Ironoxidered New Member

    "It is my impression that virtually any organ or system in the body can be used by the mind as a defense against repressed emotionality."
    Healing Back Pain - pg. 60
    pilatesgirl and Tennis Tom like this.
  7. Tennis Tom

    Tennis Tom Beloved Grand Eagle

    Good find IronO ! The answers are all in the books. The subconscious likes to sometimes play tricks on us to keep us from seeing them in it's attempt to protect us.

    pilatesgirl likes this.
  8. mindfulliving

    mindfulliving Peer Supporter

    Im a guy and had severe rectal pain...as well as other prostatitis symptoms.....i have healed...
    Alyssa5, Lesliemae and pilatesgirl like this.
  9. Forest

    Forest Beloved Grand Eagle

    Heya, @pilatesgirl, Ellen's advice of using the search box is terrific. There is so much up to date information available on this website that it really blows my mind sometimes, and it is all available through the search box in the upper right hand corner of every page. By default, it shows you a version of search that is powered by Google, which is nice, because it shows you the best stuff at the top. Thank you, @Ellen, for taking the time to pass on the advice.

    Here are a couple of excellent links from Abigail Steidley that I'd like to share.

    Abigail is currently very successful as a general Martha Beck trainer and life coach, but when she started out, she focused on vulvodynia because those symptoms had been a huge part of her own life and she had had a remarkable recovery. In fact her original web address was vulvodyniacoach.wordpress.com. You can explore her old site using the internet archive:
    At that point, her blog was called "The Vagina Dialogues," so, from a marketing standpoint, it was pretty focused. Now, as I mentioned before, her focus is broader, so it might be worth poking around the old site.

    It appears that she brought over all of the old posts from her vulvodyniacoach site to her new site, anamsong.com . These are truly tremendous resources, and I very much hope that she keeps them available for a very long time.

    Here is her 2008 "How-To" post for people wanting to take a TMS approach to pelvic pain:

    Next is her personal story of recovery from vulvodynia. About it, she wrote, "This is probably the most thorough answer I can give to the question: what was your story?"

    Finally, here is an interview she did with Dr. Schubiner. About it, she wrote, "Dr. Schubiner and I speak at length in this 50 minute recording about mind-body healing, addressing pelvic pain issues of all kinds."

    I hope this helps! If anyone has trouble listening to any of the mp3 files, let me know and I may be able to help. Please let us know what you find that is helpful and keep us updated on any progress you make.
  10. pilatesgirl

    pilatesgirl Peer Supporter

    Thank you all for responding. It is the FEAR that is driving this. I have also sensitized myself to focus on my pelvis. My hypervigilance of the symptoms makes them so much worse.

    I just started reading Hope and Help for your nerves again and since I healed from anxiety and ocd in the past with her techniques it was like having an old friend back in my life.
    Claire Weekes says only certain symptoms are produced in nervous illness but, I have a feeling if she were alive today she would add quite a few more symptoms to her list.

    So I am going to face, accept, float and allow
    Time to pass. I will remind myself it's not the symptoms that are important or where they are located, it's the fear attached to them that is. I am grateful for this forum and the supportive, encouraging words from all of you.
    North Star, Leslie735, Becca and 2 others like this.
  11. Leslie735

    Leslie735 Well known member

    You can do this! I was having urinary urgency from December until recently. I'm not saying I'm "healed" but I finally got my mind in the right place and the fear started to go away and so did the "urge." I still get it when I over drink in water but instead of getting scared I ignore it. But now it seems to be replacing itself with pelvic/bladder pain and now and whole new fear is consuming me. Feel free to PM me and we can help each other!
  12. happygal

    happygal New Member

    Hi Pilatesgirl,
    I am rereading Hope and Help now for my myriad of stress symptoms and just reread how soreness and pain are the result of muscular strain brought on by tension. Specifically, she talks about chest pain and scalp pain - but it must surely extend to all muscles. Worry will only bring on more tension and you are surely hyper-sensitized and the worry will only make everything worse. And tense pelvic floor muscles are the cause of so much vulvodynia pain.

    You know that I recovered from vulvodynia. I am certain that you will as well.
  13. Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021)

    Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021) Beloved Grand Eagle

    Hi, Pilatesgirl. The key word I saw in your first post about the symptom is doubt.
    That's a tough one to overcome, and it usually comes from fearing the symptom will remain or get worse.
    Maybe try to spend some time telling yourself it is 100 percent emotional from TMS and not structural.
    And try to think of other things that relax and make you feel good.
    Leslie735 likes this.
  14. Leslie735

    Leslie735 Well known member

    This is exactly what I am struggling with!
  15. Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021)

    Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021) Beloved Grand Eagle

    Doubt and worry are the Darth Vaders of TMS. One feeds upon the other.
    Let "the Force" of TMS knowledge and practicing healing techniques be with you.
    It ain't easy, but it woiks!
    Leslie735 likes this.
  16. Alysa

    Alysa New Member

    I am dealing with something that seems to be identical. I am curious if anyone ever came to a resolution on these issues or have they improved?
  17. pilatesgirl

    pilatesgirl Peer Supporter

    Hi Alysa,
    I'm sorry you are in pain. I have been painfree for several months now. You can go back and read my posts. Let me know if you have any questions.

    Alyssa5 likes this.
  18. Abigail

    Abigail New Member

    I can absolutely reassure you! I had the exact same pain you are talking about, and using the TMS concepts brought me to a pain-free place! I've been pain-free for over ten years now. You can totally do this. I write an entire blog about using TMS for pelvic and other pain, so if you need any support, you can go read posts (there are many, as I've been writing since 2008). I think you'll feel much less alone! There's so many people out there using TMS ideas for vulvodynia.

    You can do this!


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