Day 4 "What was the most disheartening thing a doctor has told you about your symptoms?

Some 15 years or so ago, a distinguished orthopedic surgeon examined me, looked at my MRI's and told me I would never be out of pain. Luckily, I was not a surgical candidate. The well intended doctor simply advised that I learn to live with the pain. It was devastating. I was a young mother and had a promising career as a museum curator. Living with intractable pain was never an option.
After coming to so many other medical dead ends, I finally found a chronic pain specialist who suggested I learn about Dr. Sarno's work. That was a year ago. I am SLOWLY unlearning my pain. Parts of it I developed as a child. I now realize that allopathic medicine will not provide a solution for me. Working through TMS programs such as this one give me the structure I need to carry on.

 

Hi, caninesense.

You are right-on with your thinking. TMS healing is the answer.
That doctor ought to take a course in bedside manner. It is wrong for anyone, much less a doctor,
to tell someone they will always suffer pain.

You know that you have some repressed emotions from childhood. Journal about that and it can lead you to
self-discovery and healing, as it did for me. It went back to when I was seven and my parents divorced.
It left me with feelings of abandonment and insecurity. I journaled and discovered that they had TMS too,
although none of us knew what it was called at the time. I was able to understand them better
and forgive them. Forgiving ended my back pain.

We are all here to help each other. Keep posting about your progress.
It will take 100 percent belief in TMS to heal.

Meanwhile, practice deep breathing and meditation. Some great free videos on that at Youtube.
Also relaxation videos.

Try to enjoy yourself and say or think a positive mantra such as: I am feeling great. I am a happy camper!

 

Before I was diagnosed with Fibro, one Doctor told me I probably had it but they were not going to diagnose it. I guess they were scared I was going to come after them for financial support from Govt, which I never did. And when I transferred to another doctor, my papers from still another doctor unequivocally read that I was crazy and that I never should have remarried. That was a good one. She had issues with her own divorce. Everybody has their own issues. Made me laugh. The same doctor said I had a crooked back and had sent me for massage therapy where I was told I had a hypertrophic back. I just added it to the list.

 

Oops forgot to say that Doctor who diagnosed me with Fibro said I would never get better. Only in my darkest moments have I ever thought this was true. The most damage that was done was when I was a new convert to Christianity and members of the church said my emotional pain was a gift from God and that I was experiencing other peoples pain. I wouldnt believe that the God who I believed in would give me such a Gift and not show me how to cope with it. Very confusing.

 

Hi, Fifi. I hope you can forget what those Christians told you. No one knows why bad things happen to good people.
Only God knows. All we can do is trust that he loves us and whatever happens to us is part of his plan for us.

I'm a lifelong Catholic and am 84 and it's still all a mystery to me. I do feel better when my belief in God is strongest.

The gift God gave you and all of us is to love him and each other and do good if we can.

Bless you and here is a hug from me.

 

Thank you, Walt. I Agree. I wasn't sure whether I should include this comment as I didn't want to upset anyone or be misunderstood. All my life I have been pursued by those who believe that my sensitivity is somehow a gift to be developed. The scripture I particularly like is "we see through a glass darkly". I don't have to have all the answers. I make mistakes. (I even answered this question before I did the 4th day (which I just discovered today when I actually started the 4th day of the program, Tee Hee). I spent a good part of my life thinking I had to fix people, places and things (as well as myself, of course). How tiring and presumptuous of me. I find it comforting now that I know that I am not the one in charge!

Blessings and hugs back to you.

 

Hello Fifi,

As someone who is highly sensitive myself I think it can be both a blessing and a curse. I'm also trying to learn that I don't have to fix everyone or every problem, that it is ok to say no. Sometimes you just have to let things be... and that is hard! I like that I feel things deeply, but you can't be in that state all the time; you have to find a balance - easier said than done.


Kindly
Simplicity

 

Hi, Simplicity. I'm glad you have reached the understanding with yourself that you don't have to fix everyone or every problem.
Some people can eat us alive, wanting more and more of us. Some people even like being miserable and passing it on to others.
I'm sure you will not stop caring and wanting to be helpful, but as you say, find a balance. I think a balance is the way to heal most TMS pain.

 

Thank you Walt, you are such a treasure!

 

Hi, Simplicity. Thanks for your kind words.

I had a roommate whose friend often called him at 2 am and told him her problems for hours. She was only thinking of herself, so no wonder she needed help. He liked to talk, so I don't think it bothered him. I slept in the bedroom next to his and it bothered me. I met the woman and she was totally self-absorbed. That's no way to be.

I like your mantra from yesterday very much.

 

Hello again Walt!

Yes, what a self-adsorbed woman. I can't imagine having to deal with that, I would go mad getting calls in the middle of the night. Jeez.

I've met plenty of similar people in my life, I must admit, who are only interested in themselves. I think a lot of us with tms (with the type of personalities we tend to have) are quick to give too much and are afraid to stand up for ourselves because we want to be liked. Yet again it's about balance... and I guess every relationship, no matter the nature of it, ebbs and flows, but the foundation must be built on respect. I'm working on my self-worth and trying to be more assertive, but I always think kindness is king.

Do you mean my signature? It's a quote by Einstein... I figured he knew what he was talking about.